Today, while on my run, I saw a middle-aged man sleeping near a business condo. I approached him and asked if he was "ok." He grabbed my leg, held onto it with a death-grip, and moped about how horrible his life was - for ten minutes. At least the weather was nice. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while working as a hotel guard, I found a homeless man lying in the grass. I asked him to move and he ignored me, continuing to lie there with his head resting on his arms and a big smile on his face. I got annoyed and started to yell at him. After a few minutes, I realized he was dead. FML
Today, while I was walking home from work, it started to rain. Clutching my bag in one hand, I started to run so I wouldn't get too wet. I saw a man running towards me and all of a sudden he tackled me to the ground. He thought I had stolen someone's handbag. FML
Today, as I exited McDonald's after a quick lunch, a man in a jogging outfit ran past, snatching my handbag right off my shoulder as he tore past. He must have been at least 50. I broke down utterly exhausted before I could chase him even a single block. I'm 24. FML
Today, while running, a man ran up next to me and started jogging with me. He asked if he could run with me and I said yes. Later, when I told him I was going home, he followed me home. When I asked him to leave, he sat down on my lawn in protest. He has been there for over 4 hours. FML
Today, as I was jogging on the boardwalk, an old guy tripped me with his cane. As I was getting back up, I heard him say to his wife, "I wanted to see if she would actually fall." FML
Today, I saw a man lying face down in a field and thinking he was injured, I ran over to help. As soon as I got to him, I realized he was completely naked. He stood up and chased after me. FML
Today, I was walking by the side of the interstate because my car broke down. A nice young man stopped and asked if I was tired of walking. I said yes, to which he replied, "Try jogging asshole" then laughed and drove off. It was raining balls. FML
Today, I was brutally run over by a man in a wheelchair. FML
Today, I was at the park when I saw a homeless man sleeping on a bench. I thought it would be funny to throw a small rock at him. He thought it would be funny to pull out his knife and chase me for six blocks. FML
Today, I was out jogging, when I saw a girl fall off her bike and start crying. I ran over to see if she was hurt. Apparently her neighbour thought I was trying to kidnap her, because he ran out with a baseball bat and threatened to beat me to death if I didn't get lost. FML
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Top comments
gogo_speedracer 0
Awww! It was nice of you to listen for 10 minutes!
omega802 0
awwww he likes u
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Comments (128)
tinybear93 0
hahahahaha :D
Uranus_fml 0
That's creepy I wouldn't have asked in the first place. "Don't talk to strangers".
schwancy 2
Just break the wrist and walk away.
Raleigh_bruh 7
Aha, I love that movie. :]
schwancy 2
Perhaps if the OP had seen the movie this incident never would have happened.
oliviap97 3
at least you have a positive attitude about it:)
DemonicFatty 2
just my thoughts
rocky2289 0
trolllllllllllllls.
linx468 8
It's as if you wanted to get such a response from him, in the future don't ask people if they're ok without getting ready to listen to their problems.
Rheannon 0
I hear wedding bells. lol Jk. was it a hobo?
rocky2289 0
42- Isnt it about time for your mom to call to make sure your in bed also?
MetalmaidenDeth 0
You deserve it for not being a superhero.