Today, while my mom was out, I took the car out to CVS to get some food, even though I'm not legally allowed to drive. As soon as I got back in the car, my mom pulled up 2 parking spaces away from me. She didn't notice me bend down to hide... until I accidentally hit the horn in the process. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I borrowed my dad's car to run a quick errand, which he never lets me do. I thought I’d got away with it until he got home and started yelling. I forgot, dad always reverses into driveways, while I prefer to drive straight in, and I'd parked his car facing the wrong way. FML
Today, I accidentally crashed my mom's car into my dad's car. FML
Today, I was trying to do a nice thing and let my friend's mom borrow my car. I went to move my mom's car that was parked behind me so that I could get my car out, and then proceeded to back into my dad's new company car. FML
Today, my mom drove my car and had to make a U-turn on a narrow street. Instead of slowing down, she sped up to turn, running off the road and denting my car. To make things worse, she blamed me for not giving her good directions, then followed that up with, "It's not that bad." FML
Today, I decided to drive my mothers Bentley. She is out of town and told me not to go near the car. Being 17, I didn't listen. As I was backing out the driveway, I was hit by an SUV, seriously damaging my moms car. Who was driving the SUV? My mom, coming home early. FML
Today, I noticed a car following me all the way to my house. It was dark so I got really nervous and called the police. The person got out of the car. It was my mom. FML
Today, I illicitly borrowed my dad's car to go to the store, but crashed into my mom's car as she and dad were returning from my grandma's house. Both cars are totalled, my mom is in hospital with a broken collarbone, and I realised dads really can make steam come out their ears if they’re really mad. FML
Today, while at the grocery store, I saw my mother. I thought it would be funny to scare her by sneaking up and grabbing her ass. Not only was it not my mom, I left the place with a ban from ever returning to that store. FML
Today, while on a road trip, I went to the bathroom at a gas station and locked the door. Turns out the lock was automatic and I'd actually unlocked it. My mom walked in on me, but instead of apologizing and leaving, she yelled at me in the middle of the gas station. FML
Today, I was riding in the backseat while my mom was driving. Noticing she was driving way over the speed limit, I opened a police siren app on my iPod to make her slow down. When she realized, she pulled over, kicked me out of the car and made me walk home. FML
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Top comments
nerdsgetmehot 23
I stopped at "...even though I'm not legally allowed to drive." You're lucky that you didn't get pulled over, dumbass.
FFML_314 12
We all get a bit horny sometimes.
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Comments (160)
FFML_314 12
We all get a bit horny sometimes.
WishResign 0
*baddum bum... chhh*
StoryOfTheYear 15
*cough* *pun jack from OP* *cough*
FFML_314 12
Hell no! I don't read all of that junk before I post. >:I Dammit though!
TheRealFamilyGuy 5
honk if your horny
polarbear101 0
lmfao!!i love all thses 'commentersss' WHOS WITH ME!??
FFML_314 12
parents **** in your bed. FINISH YOUR SENTENCES!
KingDingALing 9
*Honks 50 times*
DocBastard 40
Boners- FFML was finishing FamilyGuy's fragment. Nicely done, ma'am.
heyheywaddup 7
Ahaha
amypr 20
That has nothing to do with the show Family Guy, it has to do with the fact that FamilyGuy (user) said "honk if your horny," which caused all of us to as, "My horny what?"
zp5 4
idk if you got busted by your mom, but what if you got pulled over? you'd be screwed. i like how "your mom" is the green underlined words...
fakeaccountX 6
stupid woman
zp5 4
for my last comment, the green underlined words were really "your mom". but it went away.
ericownz101 0
bahahaha number 1 just made my day xD when i read this fml i pictured the cvs across the river from me then i saw it really was in arizona.. i wonder if i know the OP!
ben1122a 0
ydi for being stupid?
Hughmadd 0
Are you related to the guy who flipped his boss off via mirror? Idiot.
really231001 0
lol!
really231001 0
lol!
theblackishkid1 6
lmao I was thinking that
vivibeatles 1
OMG i was thinking about that too! what a ******* moron!
jabba_bear27 5
lol!
Nadinek98 0
tell Ur mom Ur bro needed an anvil ?
Nadinek98 0
advil
LightningLadyy 0
Pretty sure they don't sell anvils at CVS...
sheehan35 2
lmao @48
francisw93 3
what's CVS is it an American shop?
keven305 0
yes, it's an American pharmacy store
Nadinek98 0
pretty sure I meant advil bitch
GeneralCha 3
No. Perhaps they are aspiring to be modern blacksmiths and actually do need an anvil. Never judge without know the entire backstory my friends.
TeslaFreak 2
.
nerdsgetmehot 23
I stopped at "...even though I'm not legally allowed to drive." You're lucky that you didn't get pulled over, dumbass.
writergirl69 0
She's lucky she didn't kill anyone!! There are reasons for age limits, and if it's because she failed the driving test that is ungodly dangerous! If she's stupid enough to lean on the horn while hiding, I think that makes my case.
Twistedsoul_fml 0
u do relize that by not leagly alowed she might only have her g1 or what ever it's called in the states were u can only drive with a liscensed driver of 4years or longer
nerdsgetmehot 23
#62 Even if they have their G1/permit, it was still a stupid idea to drive alone. In this situation, it doesn't matter if they're a decent driver. There are still serious consequences for driving alone when you only have a permit, and for good reason.
wwerulez14 6
Absolutely idiotic. OP you obviously lack common sense. Or maybe a conscious that actually functions properly.
Twistedsoul_fml 0
I obviuslu know op is a complete retard and ya fhl becuse of how stupid it is probably genetic cu her mom didn't notice her own car
KiddNYC1O 22
62- Spare us, please.
alexandrox 0
I've been lucky!!! drivin since I was 11 (Mexico) but been very close to gettinnpulled here 3 times wen I was 15 ghaaaa the feelin suuucks!!!!!!!
Icyyy 0
This is probably the same person from the other FML - the one where they couldn't get their drivers license without their diploma, and vice versatile.
psuboy 0
I was thinking maybe she lost her license by getting an underage or something. in which case it doesn't really seem like a big deal to drive anyway
xgetxbentx 13
82 - you realize that millions of people drive the same kind of car right? if she had no reason to look at the license plate why would she realize it was her car?
TheDrifter 24
Today I watched a drunk underaged driver get busted by her mom in a parking lot. FHL
sensboltsfan84 4
Agreed
Ketchup_Castle 30
Yeah, at least it wasn't the cops who found you first.
MeleMallory 0
"Vice versatile" is the best thing I've seen in a long time. Mainly because it's so dumb...
blocparty 0
sucks bro, sucks :/
sulitak 27
not allowed to drive but took the car anyways? no, it doesn't suck... HE sucks. that could have cost the parents a LOT of money if the kid got caught
mrsfloyd31310 0
why didn't you just order a pizza?
xLil_Mx 0
That would've been a smart idea B)
Wizardroxx 3
YDI, do YOU think you're that special that YOU can drive without a license? How pathetic.
sapphireflames11 0
Nice job, but you are lucky it wasn't a police officer.
thatpersonthere1 0
You have managed to achieve 'retard of the day' in my book. "not legally allowed to drive".... What the hell were you thinking?
Karma495 0
maybe there was no food at home.. what if u were about to starve?
skyttlz 32
people can live 3 weeks without food
Zebidee 9
Call for a pizza. OP has no excuse.
skyttlz 32
People can live three weeks without food.
suppressed08 2
I hope she ******* murdered you. Legally (until I get my license), I wouldn't even have it cross my mind unless there's some dire emergancy like a huge huge huge **** up (I don't know...a building with everyone I know in it burning down), yet here you are nipping out to the shops. ******* idiot. You should be fined, not grounded.
lwd305 0
agreed. I never even thought of doing something like that just to get food.
MuchDance90s 0
and that's why you will be a better driver than OP ever will ....... because you think before you act whereas OP acts and then thinks about it after the fact