Today, while my boyfriend was sleeping, I got naked and sat on top of him. He woke up and I asked him if he would rather stay awake or go back to sleep, in hopes that he would stay awake and want to do some naughty stuff with me. His response? To grab my butt, and then go back to sleep. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I crawled into bed, naked, wanting to get some, and hoping to surprise my boyfriend who's always complaining that I don't sleep naked. When he finally got into bed he rolled over, touched my bare ass, and said "Oh…" then rolled back over and went to sleep. FML
Today, I decided to surprise my boyfriend by waking him up with a blowjob, because he had always told me that it was a sexy fantasy of his. When he finally woke up, he got pissed off, rudely accused me of interrupting his beauty sleep, then soundly lay back down and fell asleep again. FML
Today, I woke up to my boyfriend trying to initiate sex with me in my sleep. He confessed to thinking that if he did it lightly enough, I'd think I was just dreaming. FML
Today, while trying to rouse my sleeping boyfriend for some morning sex, he came. FML
Today, my boyfriend has been super nice to me all day and I was enjoying the attention. At bedtime, he asked me if I was happy, I said yes, he asked if was I happy enough to try butt stuff. I said no, like I do every time he asks for butt stuff. He turned over and went to sleep. So much for being nice. FML
Today, I was feeling frisky and asked my boyfriend if he wanted a blowjob. He said, "Fuck no", then rolled over to go to sleep. FML
Today, while my boyfriend was asleep, I gave him a soft kiss and whispered how handsome and gentle he looked. His response, still asleep, was to roll over and let out a massive fart. FML
Today, my husband woke up in the middle of the night feeling frisky. He woke me up, got me all hot and ready to go, then before I could get into position he fell back to sleep, leaving me to fend for myself. FML
Today, I tried to wake my boyfriend up to sex. When I went to touch his penis, he elbowed me in the face, mumbled an apology and began snoring again. FML
Today, after work, I came home to my boyfriend sleeping on the couch. Feeling romantic, I started to undo his pants. My reward was him waking up and kneeing me in the eye. FML
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Top comments
DataWhore 0
he was tired, give him a break, at least he grabbed ur ass before sleeping!
spitfire35 3
what would you do if he woke you up to have sex?
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Comments (64)
Jestress 0
I'm sorry, but that's HILARIOUS! no offense to you, of course.
heyy331111 0
hahahahahahahahahahahhahahahaha.
peaceSUCKAh 0
look on the bright side he didn't push you off the bed
taz94 0
lol
X_Life_Sucks_X 0
At least he grabbed your ass. LOL
Wildbluesun 2
I can totally image my boyfriend doing that. XD And yeah I agree with everyone else, waking a man up to a ******* is DEFINITELY the best way to initiate sex.
son4life 0
let ur man sleep an you do the same an maybe a lil later wake em up by givin him head he'll feel way better then he did before
onorexveritas 24
trial and...FAILED
cheerbabe3254 4
Haha get some bf that really loves u not some lazyass!
TheNewGuy03 29
Fuckouttahere.
mikef6919 3
Depends what you look like