Today, while I was trying to explain to my friend how smoking weed everyday doesn't make you stupid, I forgot what I was talking about mid-sentence. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I had to give a deposition ahead of a trial in which my former boss is accused of fraud. I'm not a smart man, and I smoked a joint before heading out to try to calm my nerves. I got way too high and ended up giggling like an idiot through half the deposition. FML
Today, while giving a brief presentation at work, I blanked out on what I was going to say. I tried to make a joke and tell them I'd had a brain fart, but all I managed to say was, "I farted." Well, at least they all laughed. FML
Today, I had a really big debate in my English Class about the legalization of weed. My group had to state reasons why weed shouldn't be legal and no one except me had prepared. My partner came to class totally stoned. Our group lost the debate. We got an F. FML
Today, my asshat roommate tricked me into eating a weed brownie. I thought it was his terrible attempt at baking regular brownies until it kicked in at college. I was so high, I started giggling like a schoolgirl when my instructor said "Dickens". Now everyone thinks I'm a retard. FML
Today, I had to give a joint presentation at college. My partner was so high, she couldn't even pronounce her own name properly in her introduction. I'm pretty sure her antics are going to get us both failed hard. FML
Today, whenever I get into arguments, I end up mixing up words. I was trying to prove a point by saying a type of chips, and was debating between Dorito chips or BBQ chips. I ended up saying "burrito chips." I said my friend would "sell me out for a bag of burrito chips." FML
Today, my parents felt the need to lecture me about how people who "smoke the reefer" are a "waste of life" and will never amount to anything. I was baked during the entire conversation, and actually ended up breaking down in tears, because I realized they were totally right. FML
Today, I came home to my parents holding my marijuana. They told me that I had the stupidest hiding place ever, and that I was, "not only a pothead, but a dumbfuck pothead." FML
Today, I found another comment online referencing, "Smoke weed everyday." With all due respect for smoking weed, when will people learn that "every" and "day" need to be two separate words in that context? This is seriously making it hard for me to focus on my work. FML
Today, I was high on Marijuana and scrolling through Facebook when I couldn't figure out why I was seeing so much FML Posts no matter how far I scrolled and I was getting annoyed. Then I realized I was specifically on the FML Facebook Page and forgot because I was so high. FML
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Top comments
CryMoreFMLs 15
It happens to the... um... what was I saying... Damn, I forgot.
bonezisme 0
nice sounds like short term hit you bad
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Comments (728)
venezuitalian 1
to all you people who smoke weed. if its not addictive then quit smoking it. I bet you don't make it a month. really I could careless if you smoke weed. but don't lie to yourselfs. smoking weed makes the majority of people lazy pieces of shit! none of my friends ever want to do anything when there high except sit on the couch. unless there is a food run. so really because of pot I don't have friends haha because they choose the blunt over there friend they've known forever.
Yoshi_Fue 9
It may diminish your short-term memory, but it improves your long-term memory greatly. Like my b-day is July 31st. Fist pot-head to tell me happy birthday get's an e-cookie. :P I smoke it, but I haven't had any in almost 5 months. I've been doing fine without it, if I do say so myself. It's like a toy. You know you don't need it, but you want it badly. I can put it off for more important things. You can get addicted to literally anything, and we all have that one thing. Mine would be music and art. What's yours?
spacemonkey420 0
yo people just don't get it man I have extreem insomnia and I use it every night other wise I won't go to bed at all. people that don't smoke can always tell stoners that they are stupid for doing it and sotoners will come right back at them saying they are stupid for not opening up your mind to this lovely drug. I garintee that if weed was never illegal every body would be ok with it. **** this democrasy crap we need socialisum government
alexhoen 0
I don't know what else to say than "wow."
venom2421 10
If some of you think weed is so bad then how come no one has ever died from it?
Petunia888 13
Don't you just love when people bad-mouth something they only think they have a clue about? I don't think you should do it before adulthood. And I don't think you should do it all day, every day.
Petunia888 13
Other than that, use your best judgment. Not everything is for everyone. And do some actual research on it, watch documentaries, etc.
slowlybreakingme 14
you're a dumbass. and a perfect case of how weed, in fact, DOES decrease mental sharpness
ghm1234 0
it does make u stupid dumbass
fAiRyMaN3 0
lol I've done that before
mofo12 0
this argument is pretty gay!! I'm glad that ppl want to argue! everyone has there own damn opinions!!