Today, while at football practice, my teammates and I were on water break. At the bus barn next to the field, a good-looking girl was washing a bus. Some of the guys started to yell pick-up lines at her from 50 yards away, and pretty soon I chime in. She turns around. It was my younger sister. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while at a football game, I had my arm around my girlfriend. We were really close and I was just about to kiss her when suddenly her phone rang. It was her dad, telling her he's watching. FML
Today, I was talking to a swimmer I just met. I saw a cute guy and whispered to her, "That guy is hot." She asked "Who?" I pointed at him. She turned to see him, then turned back to me and said "Ew, that's my brother." She went to him, whispered something. He turned around to see me and said, "EW." FML
Today, I went to a school football game alone. I sat next to these hot girls. To seem cool, I picked up my phone and had a fake conversation with the coolest guy in the grade. Halfway through, he came over and talked to the girls. FML
Today, I was playing football for my school. I had the ball and was running down the sideline. The guy behind pulled my flag off along with my shorts and boxers. I dove to try to escape and I happened to land on the hottest girl in the class who was on the sideline. I had no pants on. FML
Today, I was approached by the head cheerleader, and she asked for my number. I was so excited that I gave it to her without question. Then she smiled, and walked away. Too bad my girlfriend was right behind me when it happened. FML
Today, as I walked on to the bus, the girl I liked whispered something to her friend. Curious, I asked what was so funny. She said she never realized that when I got on, I shook the bus. FML
Today, I saw my crush standing at the bus stop. I did the "I'm talking to someone on the phone thing," trying to be cool. Halfway through the conversation my phone actually rang, I quickly answered but it was my mom on loudspeaker yelling, "Did you bring your tampons?" FML
Today, I was driving home from my friend's house and noticed this really cute girl riding her bike. She had an amazing body, beautiful blonde hair, and looked like my kind of girl! About 10 minutes after I got home, my sister pulled up. She had just biked home from the hair salon. FML
Today, I was at a swim meet. I asked my friend if he could be my wingman and help me get a date with a girl I really liked. I told him my plan, and as I finished and turned to go to her, I noticed her standing right there, listening in on the whole conversation. FML
Today, while I was waiting for the bus, I was whistling. I saw a cute girl running and I looked at my phone so it didn't seem too awkward. I was still whistling as she passed by so it sounded like I whistled at her. She ran back to slap me. FML
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Top comments
itsnotmytree 0
That's what you get for being an obnoxious ass.
AndreaKina 0
pschh you totally deserved that, I feel bad for the girl
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Comments (250)
stringoffail 0
Bus barn? Something tells me that we're talking Great Britain here, and football refers to American Soccer. Something also tells me that if she let you and wouldn't tell a soul, you would totally plow your little sister.
PTERONOPHOBIA 0
what difference does it make whether they were playing European or American football... lol
starflake 3
It says he's from United States right underneath his post. Also, we (UK) don't use the term 'bus barn', we use 'bus stop'.
paperfox_fml 0
Indeed, until now I've never heard the term 'bus barn'. It's not an English term. We would call it a bus station. Bus stops are where buses... well, stop while doing their rounds, not where they're kept and maintained, so it wouldn't be called that, starflake.
UseTheFrags 0
Teh fook? I'm British and have no idea what a 'bus barn' is... I also haven't really heard the word 'water break', we just get water when we need it... Anyways, yeah, the OP sucks, but at least you know that all of your Yankee Football team would do your sister...
stereoskyline_fml 0
Bus barn IS an american term. It's not referring to a bus stop, but the place where they park all of the school busses at the end of the day.
eskimopanda 0
Yeah bus barn is a pretty common term in America. It just means where the buses park and if you if to tell the bus drivers something where you call. In Indiana you look dumb if you Dont know what a bus barn is loll
lmmmr 0
I wouldn't say it is a common American term. Perhaps in some places, but I have never heard it used.
Lexia_fml 0
Yeah, unless you've traveled to at least half a dozen places and heard it there, please don't call it common. I had no idea what it was.
stringoffail 0
Never heard "bus barn" before. When I was a kid, they parked the buses at the bus yard. Several times a year a kid would fall asleep on the bus and wake up at the bus yard. We'd make fun of those kids.
bexox 0
Im American, and I cant say I've ever heard that one
thisawkwardchick 15
Something tells me that none of the people replying to this comment read the second paragraph.
LesYeuxDeDario 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
be happy, shes hot xP
j_729 18
Why?
amatayo 0
I call false on this one! 50 yards bring out the yard stick much?
BussellRishop 0
I think his yard stick was definitely out, that's what makes this one messed up.
BREEawNUHH 0
ROFLMAO.
penizulaface 0
MAO MAO MAO
kdaddy 0
hes on a football field which if you didnt know is marked by yard lines half field is 50 yds
spillproof 0
that's hot
TheAmazing_fml 0
YDI it for being attracted to ur sister ******! ahahahaha!!!
Darkon 0
He is attracted to his sister as far as I know that wouldn't qualify him as a fag, now if it were his brother.
bhatia26 0
haha nice work #6
sbarre1 0
How do you not know where your sister works? O_o YDI for not caring about your family.
IrishHero12 0
YDI for being an idiot that can't even recognize his sister......... Have fun at home........ Akward!
shnibz101 0
Salted!!!!!!!
shnibz101 0
#7WTF!?!?!?!