Today, was my boyfriend's birthday. He wanted a blowjob while playing Call of Duty 4. In typical gamer fashion, he slammed his controller down when he died. Into my head. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was giving my boyfriend a blow job, he was twitching and moving around and saying "oh yeah" then he said "take that bitch". I looked up to see he was only excited about how he is domination in Call of Duty 4. FML
Today, I agreed to give my husband head while he played Call of Duty. I was happy because he enjoyed it at first, until he started getting his ass kicked in the game. He lost and angrily blamed me for distracting him. FML
Today, I found out that whilst I was asleep last night, my boyfriend was playing on his XBox. I also found out that whenever he unlocked a new level, achievement or just generally beat someone's ass, he would celebrate by pulling out one of his pubes and putting it in my mouth. FML
Today, my girlfriend was giving me a hand job. As I reached my climax, she thought it would be funny to turn my 'weapon' against me. Boom, headshot. FML
Today, I was playing Xbox live with my boyfriend. I was bored so I decided to mess around. So I put down my remote and unbuttoned his pants. Two minutes in he said, "Hurry up, we're getting killed without you. Besides you're way better at video games." FML
Today, it was my birthday. My boyfriend had been telling me for the past two weeks that he had something planned for the occasion. His plan? Me watching TV with his parents, who hate me, while he went to work. His gift? A brand new Xbox 360 for himself. FML
Today, a character in the video game I was playing called my character a slut. My boyfriend ripped the controller from my hands, shot him dead, then fired the rest of my ammo into his corpse while yelling "FUCK YOU, BUDDY!" Good to know I'm dating a total lunatic. FML
Today, I played Call Of Duty online against someone who turned out to be wanking. FML
Today, I went to my boyfriend's house and sat around while he played video games. He turned to me and could see I was annoyed. Then he told his friends on XBox Live that he needed a 10 minute break to have sex with me. FML
Today, for my birthday, my boyfriend presented me with his cock with a ribbon on it. Basically, HE wanted sex for MY birthday and had the nerve to accuse me of being ungrateful. For his birthday last month, I gave him multiple Xbox games. He couldn’t even be bothered to get me flowers. FML
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Top comments
mclayton37 0
See... Your boyfriend has a problem. He likes to mix his pleasures. It just doesn't work. You have to put a stop to it, before one day he's playing video games, talking on the phone, taking a dump, and gettin a BJ from you all at the same time.. NO! It's like that episode of Seinfeld when George tries to enjoy some pastrami and watching TV while having sex.. you gotta stop it before it gets worse!
Envy_fml 0
Ouch.
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Comments (235)
SushiChef 0
ROFL ROFL ROFL
ace135 3
wow either he is gay or u suck at giving ******** but it is just a game lol wtf?
mini_cupcake 0
i think you missed the point. SHE GOT HIT IN THE HEAD!!! it most likely wasn't her fault. he was just driven by gamer instinct. I slam my controller down when i'm frustrated! it wasn't that she suckked, he's just a gamer! give him a break!!!
lightningbug 0
I'm sick and tired of seeing all of these people who come here just to rant... A ******* isn't demeaning or disrespecful unless the giver isn't happy to do it. If you're both enjoying the situation- what can be wrong with that? My boyfriend and I are both console players... I see where this could be enjoyable ;) But please, all of these small minded people who think sex is wrong obviously have never gotten laid. I do think sexual acts are wrong outside of a loving relationship.... but in one as long as you're both having fun I see no wrong anywhere! All these stupid feminist kids on here need to just shut up. ********, yeah, ARE one-sided... but what's so wrong about wanting to please your boyfriend? I'm sure he returns the favor...
mini_cupcake 0
i don't think they're one-sided. some chicks enjoy giving their men what they want. that's good enough for me =D
C1407 0
Haha, this made me laugh, my boyfriends also a gamer. :p
bonsushi 0
Sounds like a simple Bandolier and Stopping Power, followed by Dead Silence. ;D ;D
bonsushi 0
And #260, please for the sake of your sanity do not research BDSM or any type of submission, if you think a guy getting a ******* while playing a game is "humiliating" and "degrading".
regalarius 0
*facepalm* do you really want this kind of person knowing about BDSM??
anonyfuck 0
YDI for dating a creepy loser...
mumafiedmustangs 0
on behalf of the entire male gaming comuiity thank you for 1 doing the coolest thing you could do for a gamer and for distacting him so i could get that kill haha lol
shaPOW 0
he doesn't deserve you.
mini_cupcake 0
i don't think so. if he likes heels wear heels. if he wants a bj during video games. fuckking get on your knees!!!