Today, trying to be a responsible parent, I bought my daughter a pack of condoms in case she ever decided to have sex. She turned them into balloon animals and went back to playing video games. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my mom was snooping around my room, and found the unopened box of glow in the dark condoms I bought myself year ago. She laughed and said, "No takers yet, eh?" FML
Today, my mother found condoms in my room. She asked why and I said, "Just in case." She started laughing hysterically. FML
Today, after I grounded my barely 18 year-old daughter for having sex with her boyfriend when I found a pack of condoms in her room while cleaning it, she responded by moving out and eloping with him. FML
Today, my mom stole the condoms out of my room and gave them to my little brother because I "won't be needing them anytime soon". FML
Today, at my 6-year-old son's birthday party, I had to explain to my boyfriend that it's not okay to use condoms as party balloons. FML
Today, my mom cleaned up my room. I had a drawer filled with condoms, 2 vibrators, and a bondage kit. She organized the condoms and vibrators in a shoe box. FML
Today, after a long and stressful day, I started fooling around with my boyfriend. When we finally got to the main event, I found out that we couldn't, because he'd used all his condoms to make water balloons. FML
Today, my parents found my box of condoms. I'm 20, so it's no big deal, and they commended my responsibility. What they don't know is I don't talk to any girls, and I bought those condoms to jerk off into. FML
Today, my mom found a condom in my pocket while doing my laundry. Instead of having the subsequent discussion about the birds and the bees my mother simply asked "Who would have sex with you?" FML
Today, I went shopping with my mother, when someone snuck a pack of condoms into our cart while our backs were turned. When we got to the register, my mom, whose wealth makes me ineligible for financial aid, noticed the condoms and she announced that she wasn't paying for the college I got accepted to next year because she doesn't want a promiscuous daughter. FML
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Top comments
parism143 28
Guess you''ve got nothing to worry about! :) Your daughter sounds awesome.
stretchedthin 20
um why didn't you talk to her instead?
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Comments (210)
animalalaska 4
there's only like 3 smart people on this board that realize that buying your kids condoms isn't responsible. it encourages sex. tell your kids to not have sex, then maybe wed have less 12 year old ****** and pregnant 14 year olds.
TurquoiseJesus 15
kids will bang regardless of what the parents want. Parents, despite what some believe, do not have absolute control over their child's world.
squideth 18
No, kiddo, that's not how proactive parenting works. See, OP just showed their daughter that she can trust them to support her and help her no matter what choices she makes, which is a great way to raise a responsible and healthy adult. You're not one of the "smart" ones, you're another ignorant pro-abstinence idiot ****-shamer.
animalalaska 4
See I was raised by very strict parents who did not approve of me having sex before marriage. i do indeed believe that I am better off for this. I have also seen friends whose parents would do things like buy them condoms "just incase." One girls life in particular is now ruined, she is messed up in so many ways and she completely regrets having sex. She wishes her mom wouldn't have encouraged her. I'm not ignorant or an idiot, first of all. Second of all, I am not pro-abstinence. If you love someone, go for it. But sex is become too casual, especially for kids. Plus, when did I ever **** shame? There are statistically more people having sex and getting pregnant under the age of 16 and this is a result of society becoming okay with it because apparently its horrible to not support your kids choices. Are you gonna help your kids steal and murder? Smoke pot? Become a drunk? Why is having sex with someone you're not in love with/sleeping around any different. I'm honestly so shocked and disgusted by what this century is turning into.
animalalaska 4
Yeah but they don't have to support wrong decisions... And if they are raised properly, some kids wont do whatever they want to. This anti-punishment, powerless parent century just makes it look like that.
stillunbroken 2
ii don't see the problem
laden_swallow09 35
I… don't think you'll have to worry about her having sex anytime soon.
Smoxxii 17
Your daughter sounds like an awesome gal.
Asher_X 15
Honestly, I don't see a problem here
lazymaze 3
I raided her well
by4x4 4
That's not responsible idiot parents these days
animalalaska 4
idiots everywhere, man. People saying this is good parenting...this is gonna be one messed up generation.
nitrog100 21
Your daughter can make balloon animals. How could you possibly feel that you failed as a parent in any way?
CLT_420 13
Well atleast you know she isn't into sex yet
Mercer93 2
Your daughter is awesome