Today, trying to be a responsible parent, I bought my daughter a pack of condoms in case she ever decided to have sex. She turned them into balloon animals and went back to playing video games. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my mom was snooping around my room, and found the unopened box of glow in the dark condoms I bought myself year ago. She laughed and said, "No takers yet, eh?" FML
Today, my mother found condoms in my room. She asked why and I said, "Just in case." She started laughing hysterically. FML
Today, after I grounded my barely 18 year-old daughter for having sex with her boyfriend when I found a pack of condoms in her room while cleaning it, she responded by moving out and eloping with him. FML
Today, my mom stole the condoms out of my room and gave them to my little brother because I "won't be needing them anytime soon". FML
Today, at my 6-year-old son's birthday party, I had to explain to my boyfriend that it's not okay to use condoms as party balloons. FML
Today, my mom cleaned up my room. I had a drawer filled with condoms, 2 vibrators, and a bondage kit. She organized the condoms and vibrators in a shoe box. FML
Today, after a long and stressful day, I started fooling around with my boyfriend. When we finally got to the main event, I found out that we couldn't, because he'd used all his condoms to make water balloons. FML
Today, my parents found my box of condoms. I'm 20, so it's no big deal, and they commended my responsibility. What they don't know is I don't talk to any girls, and I bought those condoms to jerk off into. FML
Today, my mom found a condom in my pocket while doing my laundry. Instead of having the subsequent discussion about the birds and the bees my mother simply asked "Who would have sex with you?" FML
Today, I went shopping with my mother, when someone snuck a pack of condoms into our cart while our backs were turned. When we got to the register, my mom, whose wealth makes me ineligible for financial aid, noticed the condoms and she announced that she wasn't paying for the college I got accepted to next year because she doesn't want a promiscuous daughter. FML
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Top comments
parism143 28
Guess you''ve got nothing to worry about! :) Your daughter sounds awesome.
stretchedthin 20
um why didn't you talk to her instead?
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Comments (210)
notanass21 1
Idk how this is an fml. You should be proud I her. Gamer girls are awesome
ahsanmasood 4
dude your daughter sounds awesome!!! this is like every father's best case scenario dream!
baronrat227 2
dude your daughter is way awesome
Bacontree 14
and you're upset she didn't go to her boyfriends house to use them right away, or because she didn't get what they were for?
The_Khan 12
OP: Good on you and good on her. :) This is the internetz so I suppose we do kinda approve on the video games thing. More then that though, I personally approve of what you did. It can be a touchy subject and you did well on that (buying condoms instead of pretending she will be a Virgin until she had her 3rd kid). Good on you OP!
Effinusername 7
You should be happy! at least she cares more about something other than boys. Most parents s would be very proud.
midgetism 9
will your daughter marry me xD
jh921971 10
She sounds too young still. Plus condoms expire. Definitely talk to her.
LaUruguaya 11
What kind of parent actively encourages sex?!?
squideth 18
Where the **** does it say they're encouraging it? She's being a proactive and supportive parent. Jesus you people are ******* idiots, I hope you never have kids.
animalalaska 4
(buying you kids condoms is encouraging sex and letting them know you're okay with it. Good parenting would look more like talking about what sex is, then letting them know the consequences of having sex too early and with the wrong person. But then letting them know that you're not going to rage if they do or have had sex and they can always come ask you for help or protection. If you find out your kid is having sex, you express your disappointment but you do help them do it safe since its clear they're gonna do it anyway.)
bloody_neko14 8
I fail to see the fml here. you know she cares more for games then getting laid XD