Today, the guy I've been sleeping with for the last three weeks got really drunk. I drove him home from the party and took care of him. At 2am he asked for the phone. When I asked what for, he said he wanted to drunk dial his girlfriend. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was texting this guy that I really liked. Things were going pretty well. I got a call from his number and excitedly answered it. It was his girlfriend asking if he was bothering me because he likes to text random people when he's drunk. FML
Today, my long-distance boyfriend got extremely drunk and insisted that we left the Skype call on all night so it was like I was there with him. I woke up to the sound of him vomiting loudly at 3am. FML
Today, I was woken up by my drunk girlfriend calling me and saying how much she loves me. She then stopped to tell the guy she was in bed with to be quiet because I might hear him. FML
Today, I got a drunken call from my boyfriend, which consisted of him telling me that he, "does man things like fuck bitches and roll with hoes," and that I've been, "trying to turn him into a half-ass girly man," but, "that shit ain't right." Then he threw up. FML
Today, I received a text message from my wife, who had gone out for the evening with some girlfriends, saying, "I have to take a friend home, she's drunk! I'll be staying at his place. Call you in the morning." Umm… His? FML
Today, my boyfriend video-called me in the middle of the night, drunk after a night out of partying. He told me that he was chatted up by a girl and proudly exclaimed that he told her off, given his status, all the while showing large hickeys on his neck. FML
Today, I received a text from the guy I'm into, thanking me for helping him drunkenly stumble back to his apartment last night. He ended it with, "How long did you stay?" Apparently, he doesn't remember confessing his secret love for me, or the fantastic kiss that followed. FML
Today, I was texting my boyfriend about yesterday, where he told me how much he loved me, and he wishes we lived closer. I asked him if he really meant it. Turns out he was drunk, and had no idea what he was talking about. FML
Today, it's 2:23 in the morning, and my drunken girlfriend has just rung me up from a party where she's the only girl there. She seems to be having a great time. FML
Today, I woke up in bed with a one-night stand. We got really drunk the night before so I went to make a hangover-cure breakfast. Apparently he was so drunk that he didn't remember me, and when he came to the kitchen, he knocked me out with a pan and called the cops. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
lexiBRo 0
Well.. that sucks, esp. for his g/f, but can you really expect anything out of a guy you are just casually sleeping with???
fuckitfuckitfuck 0
saw that coming halfway through the first sentence. it was probably the fact that you referred to him as the guy you've been sleeping with, as opposed to your boyfriend. this isn't an FML. this is a "I can't believe it took you that long to figure it out."
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (90)
intotheblue 0
I won't judge you or call you names, but it really DOES sound bad for you. Like #33 said, you didn't say "my boyfriend," you said some guy you've been sleeping with. It really sounds like casual sex, which means you can't really be offended that he has a girlfriend. If anything, **** HER life, for being cheated on by some drunken pig. At least now you know he's taken, so you can stop sleeping with him. I clicked FYL because it must suck finding that out, but also YDI because you should've found out whether he's in a relationship before sleeping with him.
Malexhe 0
I see no FML here. It just seems like he's your **** buddy. Its not like you're in an actual relationship with him. **** his girl friend's life for having a boy friend who cheats on her, and drunkingly calls her at 2 AM. But of course, some people may have issues with finding the line between love and casual sex that doesn't mean a damn to their partner.
Shadow_Sniper 0
#36 Exactly. There really isn't a FML here. There wasn't a relationship and it's not she was the one who was cheated on. Besides, you cannot expect much out of a **** buddy. And why are there so many people who are bashing her and calling her a ****? She had sex with a guy, who happened to have a girlfriend and she didn't know about it. If this story was about a guy and a girl who he was sleeping with, no one would refer to him as a tramp or a ****.
mcsnelly 5
Actually, #44, I would definitely still be calling the OP a **** if it was a guy. I do agree that there are an insane amount of people who still have an extreme double standard when it comes to this issue, but I hold men and women to the same standard about sex. And I still believe it's kind of slutty behavior to have casual sex, not matter who you are.
ohhhh_Ashley 0
why is it YDI? guys are jerks and aren't going to say they have a girlfriend. it's like she's going to know. besides there is a small possibility that she likes him a lot and thinks of him sort of like a boyfriend. OP FYL.
schwelty 0
You should not be going around having casual sex if you don't know how to handle one. She deserved it because she focused more on love and not the sex. It's why MOST of the time **** buddies don't work out, because one is substituting sex for love/caring/etc. Few "couples" can do this without having feelings involved from either person. Don't get me wrong I know two "couples" who can do this and works out great for them, but it is definitely not for everyone. If one wants to have a meaningful relationship, having casual sex is not the answer. I hope you learned from your personal mistake OP, YDI.
midwestjerk 0
Quality. You call him "the guy I've been sleeping with" yet are upset when he has an actual girlfriend, and it turns out that you're just an easy-to-**** piece of ass on the side? YDI for being too stupid to not see that coming.
Tubasaurus 0
This sucks for the girlfriend. If you are just having casual sex with the guy then you can't really complain. Sex =/= commitment
HRaeH 0
Dump him.
midwestjerk 0
She's not dating him, she's just ******* him.
SirAwesome 0
FH girlfriend's life. Your life is fine.
spillproof 0
I hope you gave it to him. Let him make a fool of himself
Hjelloo 0
Nice job being a complete *****. Good luck being a disgrace in life.
blahdsflksfd 0
If you have sex before marriage, then you should be arrested and castrated.