Today, my obsession with replying "Your Mom" reached a new level when my anatomy teacher asked what I'd done with my pencil. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my dad had fun embarrassing me as much as possible in my parent-teacher conference by moaning whenever the teacher talked. FML
Today, I asked my science teacher if he'd had my mom when she went to my high school. He took one look at me, glared, and said, "Oh yeah, I remember HER." I have that class every day the rest of the year. Thanks a lot, Mom. FML
Today, I was taking a biology final and was just randomly tapping my pencil. My teacher thought I was somehow communicating with the person next to me, and decided to fail me. FML
Today, I got a call from my daughter's pre-school. Apparently, she is being suspended, for answering; "What do your parents do at home?" She told them, "My parents fuck." FML
Today, I had to pick up my son from school because he was constantly talking about his "Giant pen." In mid-July, I got him a giant-sized pen (writing utensil) and he liked it very much. Apparently, one of the teachers had their mind in the gutter and thought he was talking about… you know what. FML
Today, as a natural science teacher, I was drawing a uterus on the class chalkboard. One of my students started messing around and being noisy, so I shouted, "Be quiet and check out my uterus!" FML
Today, my mom sat on a pencil and started bleeding. She then made me clean the wound on her butt and put ointment on it. FML
Today, my mom went snooping through my art bin to "clean out my old drawings". She found numerous nude pieces and accused me of selling porn. My mom mistook and threw out 57 anatomy practice sketches that I worked very very hard on, and ripped up the remainder of my drawings. FML
Today, I got a note from my son's kindergarten teacher. During free time yesterday, he told her, "Mommy was stripping". I was indeed stripping. Paint that is. FML
Today, I was pestering a co-worker, so she jokingly stated "I'll bury you!" and I replied "I'll bury your mom!". Her moms funeral was last week. FML
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Top comments
Lebeaugars95 20
guess who the teacher called after that comment
SpunkyyyMonkeyy 10
All you had to do was go to class with a pencil. I am sure McDonalds is hiring though.
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Comments (84)
krissajulia 10
Hi I'm so glad to be #1
Likian5 26
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
You want us to sympathize with your immature behavior? Get real.
Lebeaugars95 20
guess who the teacher called after that comment
puggypark 14
OP, you dumb
wcc7777777 5
#21- should i say it?
doit4ah15 10
# 57- It's called a rhetorical questions bro
BootheGhost 6
#60 Its called a joke, bro.
SpicyDuck 22
Why can't we all just laugh at this? FML is no place to lose our sense of humor!! No matter how old and over used your mom gets, it's still gonna be funny.
xboxmaniac7 9
"How over used your mom gets" Hahaha!
jonfrenzy 10
Your mom
bomzo 22
the dad?
SpicyDuck 22
73, I'm glad you found and appreciated my hidden your mom joke
tyler907 10
Dude **** you, it's always funny.
GRubi 17
He didn't really ask for sympathy. He just posted an FML...
BootheGhost 6
#101 Cause obviously, insulting someone's mother, which they most likely care deeply for, is always gonna be funny and totally isn't going to piss someone off. Granted some will take it as a joke, but eventually, ***** gonna fly.
Blaphlafagus 19
60, What do you get when you mix a rhetorical question with a joke?
random_stuff 15
Awkward, hesitant nervousness and unsure glances.
mkymouse90 17
I know the answer to this.... Your mom ...
Sandsh8rk 36
Don't stoop to OP's level.
BrickTamlandLamp 13
You don't say...
HairyPunisher 27
You have an answer but there is no question.
Rexor 9
Muscleman, is that you?
IndicaPaincakes 28
It would be "My mom" if it were Muscle man.
wiseKat99 13
Umm, all I can say is sorryOP. YDF
cyanidesandwich 21
YDF?
Rainhawk94 27
You definitely farted
kinky44 28
Yellow ducks fly.
SpunkyyyMonkeyy 10
All you had to do was go to class with a pencil. I am sure McDonalds is hiring though.
fuckyouropinion 4
Would you like fries with that sir?
hellnosucka 27
no I would like your mom with that, sir.
Faff 20
maybe dundermifflin is hiring
Butwhymeagain 12
This is funny though... no remorse!
CurlyQute 17
Some self control is severely needed.
briang959 47
Total YDI.
leary96 15
You know there's a button for that.
stargirl_95 24
"Your mom"? Really? How old are you, 13?
SpunkyyyMonkeyy 10
I'm 19 and when my friend saids, "Doug! Who ate all my icecream!" I will always yell back, "Your mom, bitch!" Friends influence this shit i swear.
warsun 27
Nah mate 13 year olds over here don't say it. 12 on the other hand.....
CloudBustah 20
#10 my brother would always insult the mother of his "enemy" when he's playing video games.