Today, it's 2:23 in the morning, and my drunken girlfriend has just rung me up from a party where she's the only girl there. She seems to be having a great time. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I realized that the only time my girlfriend ever calls me is when she's drunk. FML
Today, I was woken up by my drunk girlfriend calling me and saying how much she loves me. She then stopped to tell the guy she was in bed with to be quiet because I might hear him. FML
Today, I woke up around 5am from a party I had last night, still quite drunk. This chick was lying next to me from the night before. I kissed her, and about a minute and a half into some heavy making out, she opened her eyes and said, "Oh, it's you." Then got up and walked out. FML
Today, the guy I've been sleeping with for the last three weeks got really drunk. I drove him home from the party and took care of him. At 2am he asked for the phone. When I asked what for, he said he wanted to drunk dial his girlfriend. FML
Today, I received a text message from my wife, who had gone out for the evening with some girlfriends, saying, "I have to take a friend home, she's drunk! I'll be staying at his place. Call you in the morning." Umm… His? FML
Today, the girl I like said she was out drinking with a friend. I'm pretty sure she has been lying about all the times she has "fallen asleep" and could not talk, and is actually seeing other people. FML
Today, I drove my drunk sister home after a wild night of partying. She did not go to bed as I expected; instead, she laid in the bathtub and cried every time I left her. Now it's 3AM, and she's using her bra as a lasso for various objects in the room. The best part is I work in 4 hours. FML
Today, I went to a party, and the girl I really like started telling me how much she likes me and how she thought we would be good together. I was so drunk I threw up on her. FML
Today, I had to go pick up my mother at 3 in the morning. She had been out drinking and couldn't drive. She parties more than I do. FML
Today, I went to a party that my friends were throwing. I had a great time and got blackout drunk. I woke up to videos from my girlfriend from last night. At some point I'd managed to take off my shorts and boxers and spent the rest of the party naked from the waist down. FML
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Top comments
linshenjie321 0
**** her man , she is a hoe
tren94 0
but see going to a party as the only girl and then calling at 2am DRUNK would make anybody worry. trust isn't such a big part of the equation when booze is added in.
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Comments (52)
HanisMan01 0
Did She atleast Invite you if not then you got a problem...(been there)
bobnorris 0
gangbang
deadangel_fml 0
You should trust your girlfriend as long as she hasn't given you reason not to. Going to a party as the only girl is not a reason. Stop trying to control the one you love - if there's not trust it's not going to work out anyway, and if they cheat on you you very likely couldn't have prevented them from doing so by being more controlling, and then they don't deserve your attention. I know this sounds easier than it is.
tren94 0
but see going to a party as the only girl and then calling at 2am DRUNK would make anybody worry. trust isn't such a big part of the equation when booze is added in.
Unlucky_Gun 0
It probably wouldn't be a problem if OP's girl wasn't drunk. Drunk is the key word
danielwilliams57 6
"She seems to be having a great time" I would say is code for something?
coops456 14
You don't seem to understand that he most likely means shes getting gangbanged
stoylz 0
i feel your pain bro
ummfresh 0
Tale as old as time my friend.
CaptainSmith28 19
Tale as old as alcohol*
lmfp 0
waaaa, my girlfriend is having fun without me, waaaa.
isallwaysme 27
if she's the only girl, i could come up with a few scenarios that could end bad. some people could over power her, and there's nobody there to help. She's drunk and does something (someone) she regrets, that could end a relationship. there's a number of things that could go wrong in that picture
linshenjie321 0
**** her man , she is a hoe
Twigman8 15
Don't **** her. She is a hoe
1dvs_bstd 41
And if there's one thing we know about that, it's these hoes ain't loyal.
wbrycem 0
haha I was going to say the exact same thing as number one. At least she called haha
Etc80 0
Yeah, she's with all these guys, but she called YOU. That should tell you something. And I agree with #3
Unlucky_Gun 0
DRUNK is the key word. She's probably cheating because people tend to do dumb things when they're drunk that they wouldn't do sober. Him being the one she calls doesn't matter, and it doesn't have anything to do ith this
I'madumbass 19
I think she has a lot of male friends and a couple of them invited her to this party and went to make you jealous. I think something happened in the relationship to make her feel that way. so I guess it's working...?
JokestrMike89 0
haha, #1 and 8: you're good. I woulda thought that, too! It sounds like you're more pissed she woke you up cause she can't sleep. haha
Iloveblackmen 0
"Today, I called my boyfriend while drunk at a party with all guys, he was such a whiney bitch about it I cant beleive I'm still with him. FML"