Today, the guy I buy weed from invited me to have Easter dinner with his family, since I've nowhere else to go. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Stellar parenting
Today, at age 23, I met my absentee father. He went on about how much he missed me and wanted to know more about me. He then asked if I knew where he could get some good weed, and said he'd share it to make up for all the missed birthdays and Christmases. FML
Today, my father contacted me for the first time in close to 2 months. The first thing he did was ask if I wanted to buy some weed. FML
Merry Xmas
Today, a friend had invited me to Christmas dinner since I have no family close by. When I got there, she told me that her and her husband had forgotten they had another dinner to go to, and asked if I would watch their kids for them. They each grabbed a handful of cookies I had baked and rushed out the door. FML
Today, it is both my birthday and Easter. My whole family came into town and my mom made a big dinner with all of my favorite foods. After church, I took a nap. When I woke up, all the food, including my cake, was gone. No one thought to wake me up. FML
Miscommunication
Today, I went to a going away party for a coworker. I had brought weed for the party and at one point a guy asked me if I have a Grindr. I replied, "No, I don't use those dating apps. I do have a Fetlife but that's it, if you want it." He apparently meant a weed grinder. Most awkward 3 hours ever. FML
Today, my whole family made an hour-long drive to a restaurant that's just a few minutes away from my place. I wasn't invited. FML
Harry Pothead
Today, my husband said he wouldn't be talking to me for weeks, because I didn't buy him weed. Yeah, I paid all the bills and the rent this month. FML
Today, after my close friend had his baby, he told me that he was no longer going to be selling weed at his house. I was happy for him, because it's unsafe. Until I found out he was still selling at my house with the help of my roommates, without telling me. FML
Today, I finally decided to introduce my boyfriend to my parents. Surprisingly, he and my father already knew each other, so I asked him how they met. Now I know where my boyfriend gets all his weed. FML
Today, the guy I'm dating took me to a dinner party at a couple's house. Halfway through dinner, I realized they were having the dinner party for the sole purpose of introducing him to their recently single daughter. FML
Top comments
loueasy 23
The ham won't be the only thing that's smoked
gobroski 11
That's nice....
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Comments (105)
Tomryan279 10
It's little weird but at least he was nice enough to invite you when you couldn't go to Easter with your family. Also I was just about to post what I have written above when it occurred to be that he could be a cop and he's inviting people over and arresting them also. I'm pretty sure I'm wrong but keep that in mind of you go to the party
izzajaneful 24
If he were a cop, he could arrest OP at any time. What in the world would the point of such a ridiculous ruse?
BlackBoyFly 11
Might be a Loud dinner.
mrdvs31 3
Eat up
TAntobella 14
Well now you do! That was nice of him!
livelaughlovepie 22
I honestly think that's sweet of him!
MiaTheMartian 21
That's actually really nice!! omg
NorthernBuck92 5
I don't know if that counts as a FML
ezrajab 22
So baked or roasted?
Miss_Whipped 43
Toasted!
mysteryman98 6
I think I'd prefer fried
ALittleFreak 15
That is too ******* funny, obviously you're buying from the right guy!
sofiaem 8
Awww