Today, the girl I've been seeing for just over a week casually let me know that she'll slash her wrists if I ever leave her. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found out that my girlfriend of one week is suicidal and crazy about me. She showed me that she'd carved her old boyfriend's name in her arm, and she threatened suicide if I ever left her. FML
Today, I had a great time with a girl I liked. I asked her out and she said yes. She also said she cuts herself and if I ever broke up with her, I'll be responsible for her death. FML
Today, the girl I've been seeing for less than a week started raging and ended up threatening me with a knife, after I shot down her idea of getting married next month. FML
Today, my girlfriend of 3 weeks gave me an ultimatum: marry her, or she kills herself. FML
Today, I caught my girlfriend cheating on me. Now she's threatening to kill herself if I don't forgive her. FML
Today, my girlfriend of three weeks basically threatened to kill herself if I don't start thinking about having a child with her soon. FML
Today, my girlfriend's mom pulled me aside and started telling me about how her daughter was extremely depressed and suicidal before she met me, and how happy her family is because of me. I was planning on breaking up with her within the next week. FML
Today, after many, many attempts to get her out of my life, the girl that is stalking me told me that she loves me and our love can only be ended by her killing either herself or me. FML
Today, I was planning on breaking up with my girlfriend of five years in two days time. She just mailed me a care package that said, "I'd die without you." FML
Today, after a week of intense fighting, my girlfriend of 4 years and I hung out. She told me she loved me, and I pointed out that last week she said she was going to dump me. Without missing a beat, she replied, "Only to scare you into submission." FML
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Top comments
kangx1 28
Just casually lure her to an asylum
mikepzz 27
You should hop on the nope train and run as fast and as far away as possible.
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Comments (170)
jesterinperil 28
Run far and run fast
pinque 19
What a psycho ?)
Tutetheblack 20
If it was a joke then I guess it's okay. If she wasn't fcuking with you, you been warned she's going to cut you too some day.
bhfriday 9
That's scary
barneyisawesome_fml 9
Cuz nothing says casual dating like suicide threats.
JEVCLQ 17
God damn. Run and let some mental clinic or a suicide foundation know.
Sheepalicious 20
This is when you report it and have her carted off to the looney bin.
neon_cupcake 5
get out now before it upgrades to she will kill herself :(
laden_swallow09 35
I'm with 51 on this; call her out on her bluff. I had the same problem a few years ago, but I know that not everyone's the same. If she isn't bluffing, that's totally on her and not your problem. Either way, she does need professional help. You need a woman, a grown-up, not a project.
WitEluded 13
Tell her you got a new phone from work and have a new number. Then give her the number of one of those AI text bots that will have a conversation with her. Problem solved Then block her number for real and if she ever finds you in person pretend, to only speak Portuguese.