Today, the girl I've been seeing for just over a week casually let me know that she'll slash her wrists if I ever leave her. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found out that my girlfriend of one week is suicidal and crazy about me. She showed me that she'd carved her old boyfriend's name in her arm, and she threatened suicide if I ever left her. FML
Today, I had a great time with a girl I liked. I asked her out and she said yes. She also said she cuts herself and if I ever broke up with her, I'll be responsible for her death. FML
Today, the girl I've been seeing for less than a week started raging and ended up threatening me with a knife, after I shot down her idea of getting married next month. FML
Today, my girlfriend of 3 weeks gave me an ultimatum: marry her, or she kills herself. FML
Today, I caught my girlfriend cheating on me. Now she's threatening to kill herself if I don't forgive her. FML
Today, my girlfriend of three weeks basically threatened to kill herself if I don't start thinking about having a child with her soon. FML
Today, my girlfriend's mom pulled me aside and started telling me about how her daughter was extremely depressed and suicidal before she met me, and how happy her family is because of me. I was planning on breaking up with her within the next week. FML
Today, after many, many attempts to get her out of my life, the girl that is stalking me told me that she loves me and our love can only be ended by her killing either herself or me. FML
Today, I was planning on breaking up with my girlfriend of five years in two days time. She just mailed me a care package that said, "I'd die without you." FML
Today, after a week of intense fighting, my girlfriend of 4 years and I hung out. She told me she loved me, and I pointed out that last week she said she was going to dump me. Without missing a beat, she replied, "Only to scare you into submission." FML
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Top comments
kangx1 28
Just casually lure her to an asylum
mikepzz 27
You should hop on the nope train and run as fast and as far away as possible.
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Comments (170)
SookyLala 13
Tell her shes a dopey attention seeker, and leave her. call an ambulance after
SasquatchDeluxe 10
Looks like you're trapped. I hope at least the sex is good.
laughingtoohard 14
Make plans to move out of town on the NOPE express
rocketgurl 15
Run OP, run.
Kramer1998 20
Take her to a therapist, if this doesn't work then fake your death, learn French, hope over the border to Quebec City, and live your life on as Jean Garçon.
victorvldv 8
Someone call Hitchcock
EmoKami 21
Time to cut to the chase and admit this poor girl...you can't just live on a razors edge, it's emotional suicide!
metalbass 6
Dude, forget her and run. NOW!
Starham1 14
Well, if my girlfriend ever says this, I would dump her just to see if she really meant it.
Dkman 11
In the words of a Tom hank classic. "RUN FOREST, RUN