Today, someone painted the "Dark Mark" on the side of my car. It won't come off and my kids refuse to get in because it means "a wizard died in there." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I woke up to find "Fuck you, Harry" painted on my car. Harry's my neighbour. FML
Today, every time I think of having any children, I remember that an idiotic neighbor let her kids paint all over my car with permanent marker, so I eventually forget about it. FML
Today, my kids decided to draw on the walls with permanent marker, and now my house looks like a modern art exhibit. FML
Today, I found a very large pumpkin super-glued to my car. It will not come off. FML
Today, my two boys decided to draw in permanent marker on the leather seats of the car I have had up for sale for 3 weeks with no interest. I called my husband to tell him we're going to have to keep it. He just made an appointment with a guy who has cash and is ready to buy it tomorrow. FML
Today, someone spray painted a black skull on the side of my house. We painted over it and installed lights to hopefully persuade intruders not to vandalize the property because it would be a bright area. The lights were stolen. FML
Today, it's memorial day weekend. The cops are all over the place watching for speeders and drunks. Some complete dickhead decided to spray paint "cop killa" on the side of my car. It won't come off. FML
Today, I woke up to a Swastika, "Go home" and "Trump2020" spray-painted on my car. FML
Today, my daughter decided to draw me a heart for my birthday. Unfortunately, she drew it on the side of my car. With a rock. FML
Today, I took my two kids to a restaurant with a graffiti-themed wall and took some lovely pictures that I promptly posted to family on social media. I didn't notice until a couple of hours later it said "ANAL?" in huge writing behind my dear child's head. FML
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Top comments
I_iz_B_a_troll 24
That's awesome, if I were you I'd go all out and just make it a death eaters art car. Or if you're too scared you can put a red circle with a slash through it and make it a Dumbledore's army car. :)
perdix 31
Sell it to Voldemort, duh.
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Comments (93)
Grimnirwher9 21
Have you tried Mrs. Skower's All-Purpose Magical Mess Remover?
Bootrick 11
It was probably your children who did it.
Lil_Saly_Danzr 10
That's not an fml that's just flat out awesome, and you have raised your kids well
rachilio 26
I like your kids.
beehardxcore 26
I wouldn't get in either.
lkhardin 13
Don't mess with Harry Potter!
butman 9
I like your kids but they are dumb. Why are you a death eater?
anonymus2 6
You have awesome kids
mixedmessages 5
This is stupid. The dark mark is not used exclusively for wizards.
Cslagem 10
Depending on your kids age, if they're smart enough it's probably one of them if they don't want to go somewhere of something