Today, on the train to work, the train guard was hot and I became stupidly nervous. I'm very shy and was trying to avoid eye-contact. He said 'THANK YOU', in a pissed off tone of voice and glared at me. I had absent-mindedly been staring in the direction of his prosthetic arm the entire time. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I went on a busy train. I packed myself in close to a very good looking woman and, too scared to say anything, looked out the window. After feeling a hand on my ass, I assumed it was her. To not ruin the moment, I didn't look back. After a few stops, I looked back. It was an old man. FML
Today, I noticed a girl looking at me on the train. Playing it cool, I decided to give her a smile and see what would happen. It came out as a creepy, seedy grin, prompting her to call security. FML
Today, I made eye contact with a cute guy from across a packed train. He then yelled out, in front of everyone, "You've got foam on your nose!" FML
Today, while commuting to work on a peak hour train, I lost my balance and accidentally grabbed a bald mans head to steady myself. To make matters worse, the words "oh gosh, I'm so sorry. I thought you were a knob" came out of my mouth before I could think about what I was saying. FML
Today, I was taking the train home from another unsuccessful job interview. As I was sitting there, I felt the urge to yawn, but before I could raise my hand to cover my mouth some guy stuck his finger in it. FML
Today, I took the subway. The man sitting across from me would not stop staring at my breasts, so when the train came to my stop, I said, "Nothing to see now, asshole." Then I noticed his white walking stick as he got up to get off. He was blind. FML
Today, I was on a train when an old man standing next to me very obviously checked me out, caught my eye, and winked. He spent the next five minutes rubbing his penis against my leg. When I turned to tell him off, the train lurched, and the old man fell face first into my breasts. FML
Stranger danger
Today, I happened to make eye contact with a stranger standing on a balcony of the apartment building across the train tracks from mine. He ran his finger across his neck like a knife and winked at me. I'm afraid to go out again. FML
Today, I was riding the train and saw a cute guy licking his lips at me. Flattered, I gave him my number when the train stopped. He looked at me and said, "Don't flatter yourself. You have mustard on your face." FML
Classic
Today, I tried to secretly take a photo of a cute guy on the train. I forgot my flash was on. He looked straight at me, smirked, and said, “If you wanted my picture, you could’ve just asked.” I got off three stops early. FML
Top comments
Paradoodle 5
you could totally fix that. when you get off just say I'm sorry I get nervous around cute guys and I'm sorry for offending you. then wink and get off
Fop 6
Ugh, I know the feeling. When I'm deep in thought, I end up just staring in a random direction. One time, I was staring at a girl's boobs without even knowing. She noticed...
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Comments (58)
NoNameForM3 0
OOwww :O
Ouroboros_fml 0
Watch where you're looking, or look where you're seeing, or look out for what you see, or keep a watch on your outlook, er, watch out for what you're looking at, or any combination of the above... or... You know what they say, All Toasters Toast Toast!
VolcomTL 0
lol. #14
RustyGuns 0
Was his arm on the floor?
TapeMan_3000 0
wow sometimes I'm avoiding looking at something and look at something else. but you don't even know what or who you're looking at until it's too late.
baby_val 0
ohh my word me too! I feel bad sometimes too cause my Friends will point it out
heyheyshelzay 0
Samee.
carteran06 0
wow smh. fyl
snowking_fml 0
I do that all the time and that just happened at probably the worst time
succubusprime 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Should've told him to get over it. If it's visible, he's asking for people to stare. The fake arm is probably used in his wounded bird routine to pick up sympathetic hot chicks. and if he was what your user name implies, think you can get a video of him riding a horse and lassoing a steer?
jjhtown 0
that was mean and y would he do that if hes hot i dont think any1 would use a fake arm to do that
s_landholm 0
so your saying any person with a physical disability is just trying to 'show off' wow somee bitch you are. that's really rude to say because some people can't help the fact that they have a disability and that they have to show it. you must be a real bitch #4.
str1kepa1n 16
You're messed up in the head -.-
Lunasis 14
wow you're a crude little bitch aren't you -.-
xdafuze 12
wow. you're a terrible person #4
indianabummer 0
Not your fault OP, sounds like he was overly sensitive about it, I wouldn't worry about it
Happy_FairyTail 10
Although I agree, I don't think he overreacted. I have SUPER short hair for a girl and I get stared at all the time. I gets SO ANNOYING and you just want to punch them.
BlueTwist89 0
Haha. YDI.
erjaguam 0
watch what you do next time. staring is rude.
leilaostara 1
Can you read? She was trying to avoid eye contact, and she didn't even notice his fake arm!
Jewelofagal 2
Sounds like he's got a lot of baggage about his injury. Not a mentally or emotionally healthy person at all.
ColdGold 6
Damned if you do, and damned if you don't.
Fop 6
Ugh, I know the feeling. When I'm deep in thought, I end up just staring in a random direction. One time, I was staring at a girl's boobs without even knowing. She noticed...
boopityboppity 11
Me too! It was quite embarrassing, as I'm sure you know. Fortunately, she was my friend, so I was able to explain.