Today, my wife got so upset I didn't hold her while Snooki from Jersey Shore was crying, that after the episode was done she locked herself in our room crying. Now I have to sleep on the floor of my living room. Thanks Snooki. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my wife caught me crying over her miscarriage and she started yelling and screaming at me to "man up" because she should be the sad one, not me. FML
Today, it was supposed to be my night off from the baby. Instead, my wife said she "couldn't even begin to deal", so she locked herself in the bedroom and I had to watch both my baby and my stepson, who both became hyper-needy the second she shut the door. This is the fifth time in a row. FML
Today, my evening was shot to hell when I found my pregnant wife on the floor, sobbing because we'd run out of cheese sticks. FML
Today, my wife made me sleep on the couch because I ate the last Magnum Ice Cream bar. Last week, she bitched me out for singing too loud in the shower. I strongly regret leaving my ex-girlfriend of 5 years for this woman. FML
Today, my wife got back from a "homesick" trip to NY State. She brought her boyfriend back with her. FML
Today, I'm exhausted and sore from a long night of pulling semis out of the snow. My wife is pissed because I want to sleep, instead of be with her. Every time I drift off, she starts doing things like loudly unloading the dishwasher or standing by our bedroom door talking loudly on the phone. FML
Today, my wife is giving me the silent treatment and has locked herself in the bedroom, all because I politely asked her to put the dishcloth away when she was done with it. FML
Today, I had to comfort my wife after she found out that her boyfriend wasn't faithful to her. FML
Today, I got home from work and was immediately greeted by my wife following me around, moaning and complaining endlessly. I got so fed up that I went into the fridge, cut some cheese, and gave it to her, saying, "Some cheese to go with the whine." She broke the plate over my head. It was worth it. FML
Today, I ate dinner sitting on the floor. My petty roommate got pissed off during the weekend and decided the appropriate action would be to lock all the furniture in her room and refuse to give it back. FML
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Top comments
SugarRushxx 0
I think your wife needs to grow up.
saIty 17
Snooki: Worsening the life of one person everyday.
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Comments (203)
Zillie 4
Your wife is a lunatic. Tough love time. Start ripping on her & Jersey Shore relentlessly until she either (A.) realizes she's being a moron, or (B.) leaves you for some other poor sap who can deal with her assanine emotional issues.
helen29 4
your wifes a looser!!
Zillie 4
...or a loser. Hell, maybe even a lobster.
katt_is_here 24
"your wifes a looser!!" Really? Please tell me English isn't your first language. Even if it isn't, lie to me for the sake of my sanity.
djmigues 7
You mean "Even if it is," right?
katt_is_here 24
Bah, yes. Thank you. It's too early for me to be making comments. I just hate it when I see people get "lose" and "loose" confused. It isn't even a hard one! And wifes? That isn't even a word!
irritatedone 5
Your wife shouldn't even be watching that trash. You should tell to grow up or get out.
dereuter 0
She has issues
mrjude 3
Bro, you need a divorce. I mean, your wife's ******* crazy... And not just because she watched Jersey Shore.
tonyoddo 0
Dump her ass
katt_is_here 24
I'm sure she was just upset that you didn't hold her because she was crying. Who the **** cares why she was crying? She was upset and you didn't comfort her. Female emotions can build up. She could have been upset over a lot of other things she was keeping inside and that just made the damn break. But, Jersey Shore is the worst thing on television besides Toddlers and Tiaras. Ban it from your house!
katt_is_here 24
Jersey Shore is the reason I am never moving to New Jersey.
darkinkinda 0
New jersey is the reason why I'm never moving to new jersey
ZielZone 4
Your wife is a drama queen loser... Get a comfortable couch... Or change the bedroom door handle.
nerdsgetmehot 23
Every time you watch Jersey Shore, a book commits suicide.
leadman1989 16
*book stands up u_u *Draws sword *violently cuts stomach confetti spills out x_x