Anonymous
Oh, hai Mark!
Today, my wife got back from a "homesick" trip to NY State. She brought her boyfriend back with her. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Anonymous
United States
Pleased to see you too
Today, my wife, who I haven’t seen for over a month because we both travel a lot for work, got home. The last thing she said to me was that she couldn't wait to get home because she just wants some alone time. FML
Anonymous
Hamburg, Germany
You fool
Today, my wife and I both spent a weekend away separately with our close friends. However, we ran into each other, unplanned, at the airport. She was with her girls and I was with my girlfriend. FML
Home Alone 33
Policy of truth
Today, after two months of being apart from my wife of five years, who'd returned to Panama to deal with a family issue, she innocently slips into conversation that she’s been hanging out with her high school boyfriend. When challenged, she responded, “You get to see me all the time!” FML
cantwin
No good deed…
Today, my girlfriend returned from a two day trip. I'd spent the time cleaning the house and working on house projects, so she wouldn't come home and be stressed. She got upset when she got home because the house was clean, and it made her feel inadequate. FML
Anonymous
Perth, Australia
Have fun!
Today, I worked from home and, by coincidence, it was the day that my partner was going away for the weekend with some friends. When one of them picked her up, I noticed that the other friend's husband was going on the trip. So other husbands are invited… but not me. FML
Anonymous
United States
My favorite boy
Today, I came home from a two-week overseas business trip. My wife was at work, but she came home for lunch. When she came in, she brushed right past me to hug and talk to her dog. When I mentioned it, she said, "But I haven't seen him all day!" FML
longtriphome
United States
Today, I met my long distance girlfriend after two years of being separated by 900 miles. She brought her short distance boyfriend to the meeting. FML
Billy
United States
Have a Kitkat
Today, my wife came back from a three-day moms' retreat, and was mad I didn't immediately want to spend time with her. She called me 68 times (yes, I counted) while she was gone, so it was really like she never left. FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, it's my two year anniversary with my wife. She's celebrating the day with her new boyfriend. FML
TheLoneSoul
France
Today, I received a call from my wife. It would've been great if she hadn't left on a business trip three years ago. FML
Top comments
Charlie Given 28
Well it sounds like you have two choices here send her ass packing back to New York with a signed divorce settlement or do what they do in New York give them some concrete shoes and throw them in a nearby River 😂JK😜
Brightside86 31
People kind of suck sometimes. Its disheartening how often it happens.
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Comments (6)
diraven 15
Devil's triangle!
RichardPencil 32
Eiffel Tower. Spit Roast. Dr. Pepper (aka, DP)
Charlie Given 28
Well it sounds like you have two choices here send her ass packing back to New York with a signed divorce settlement or do what they do in New York give them some concrete shoes and throw them in a nearby River 😂JK😜
Brightside86 31
People kind of suck sometimes. Its disheartening how often it happens.
RichardPencil 32
Fuhgetaboutit!
spinspinsugar 12
that's NYC. people in NY state sound nothing like that
RichardPencil 32
A'right, a'ready! My beloved late dad was from Brooklyn. Intellectually, I accept that New Yorkers have varying speech patterns, but to me, New York sounds like my dad.
genuinegoodguy 9
Ex wife?
BurnInDemonFire 39
That means you get all the monies in the divorce.