Today, my son, who has ASD, told a woman how gigantic her butt was. While trying to remind him that some things are not nice to say, he screamed that her butt is the "giantest butt ever," like it was an accomplishment. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while at a restaurant, my 4 year-old son pointed at a lady and exclaimed, “Mom, her butt is even bigger than yours!” FML
Today, my husband jokingly told my daughter when she passes gas in public, she needed to blame it on the fattest and ugliest person there. We went shopping after and she let a HUGE fart out. She gasped, "Mommy!" FML
Today, I was at the park with my autistic son when I noticed a teenage girl imitating him by flapping her hands and walking on her toes. Fed up with children mocking my son, I went over and sternly lectured the girl's mother. Turns out, her daughter is autistic too and will be in my son's class. FML
Today, a classmate accused me of having butt implants because "women can't have a huge ass and pancake tits". FML
Today, I had to pick up my son from school because he was constantly talking about his "Giant pen." In mid-July, I got him a giant-sized pen (writing utensil) and he liked it very much. Apparently, one of the teachers had their mind in the gutter and thought he was talking about… you know what. FML
Today, trying to make my 6 year-old daughter to laugh, I drew a picture of a butt, a puff of air coming out and the word "Toot". My daughter thought it extremely funny. Later, when she was talking with my extremely judgmental mother-in-law, I heard her say, "Daddy taught me how to draw butts." FML
Today, I got to take my 10-year-old son to the junior high school at which I teach. When my students questioned him about what I was like at home, he told the entire class: "Well, she farts all the time." FML
Today, I was changing my son's diaper when he said "Momma." Astonished that he'd finally spoken, I clapped and smiled proudly. My clap scared the crap out of him. Literally. FML
Today, my toddler repeated a very inappropriate word I'd said when I'd stubbed my toe. He chose to do this in the middle of a crowded supermarket, loudly, and repeatedly. Now the whole town probably thinks I have questionable parenting skills. FML
Today, in a very crowded public restroom at a sporting arena, after looking to the man using the urinal to his right, my 6 year old son turns to address me on his left and exclaims, "Daddy, that man's wiener is a lot bigger than yours!" The whole bathroom heard and looked immediately at me. FML
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Top comments
RichardPencil 32
Is ASD also known as Sir Mix-a-Lot Syndrome? Symptoms include: 1) Likes big butts 2) Cannot lie
LadyRen 20
Hopefully you explained to the woman that he was special! (Or she could tell)
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Comments (4)
RichardPencil 32
Is ASD also known as Sir Mix-a-Lot Syndrome? Symptoms include: 1) Likes big butts 2) Cannot lie
DarkStorm2Bad 14
I happen to have ASD, myself. I just wanted to clarify that (in my case, at least) you're not wrong. :p
LadyRen 20
Hopefully you explained to the woman that he was special! (Or she could tell)
Lucky O'Guin 18
I hope she understood that he has ASD and that you didnt teach him to be rude.
IHaveThePower 18
That might've been him attempting to give a compliment. I'm autistic--some of the things I find interesting or cool about other people are things society scorns.