Today, my son and I attended the funeral of a family friend. It went as well as any funeral could, up until the point that my apparently drunk son tried to grope the widow. I came an inch away from causing my son to need his own funeral. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my son is such an idiot that he forgot he invited both his girlfriends to my brother's funeral. They started a punch-up over him and everyone ended up joining in since we're a very argumentative family. People got arrested and in the end both girls agreed to share my son, who was unconscious. FML
Today, I attended my husband's funeral and my son carried out the eulogy, which basically turned into a character assassination, ending with "and I hope Hell is hot enough for you, old man." Almost our entire family agreed with every word he said. FML
Today, I found out that my father, who very recently lost his wife, decided that drunkenly hitting on my long-time boyfriend's mom was a good idea. FML
Today, my son was so hungover at his wedding that he fell asleep standing at the altar and fell over onto his pregnant wife, knocking her backwards onto the floor. What should have been a happy occasion turned into a farce as we rushed her to hospital to check the baby was OK. FML
Today, I went to a friend's wedding. While I was holding my four year old son, he managed to unclip the back of my dress and give the whole church a show. FML
Today, it was my stepdad's funeral. Everything was great, until people got drunk, kicked off, and the police got called. FML
Today, my family attended the funeral of an old family friend's baby, who died in childbirth. Afterwards, my husband went around snickering and quietly telling dead baby jokes to the other attendees. FML
Today, my son is a real ass. My mother died and he literally only booked off half a day to attend his own grandmother's funeral, doesn’t plan to spend time with me after the burial, and since he booked it, all he has done is complain about the three meetings he’s going to miss that morning. FML
Today, I am completely mortified. At my father-in-law's funeral, my husband put a bottle of beer on the coffin and announced to the room his dad was such a tight-fisted sod, it was the first drink he’d ever had on him. FML
Today, despite all my begging for him to at least be civil, my son started his eulogy at his dad's funeral with the words, “Let me tell you a few things about the bastard in the coffin over there.” It only got worse. FML
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Top comments
Ajwc101 24
Who attends a funeral drunk?! I feel so bad for the widow. F her life.
xoxokelsey11 5
I'm imagining a 20 year old groping a 90 year old...
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Comments (115)
howrudoin 11
Sounds like a will ferrell wedding crashers moment minus the rejection and the approach lol
dogpup4 23
That was confusing as hell until I saw it said widow, not window.
leilaostara 1
The first time I read that, I thought he said his son was trying to grope the window.
RochelleRedvines 8
Oh...I didn't see this comment before I made my own...
Redoxx_fml 22
Not unless her son's name is Sterling Archer
mscat 0
Why would you bring your drunk son to a funeral?
RochelleRedvines 8
My dyslexia caused me to read this as "tried to grope the window." ...Awkward...
RochelleRedvines 8
I now see that many people read it as "grope the window." I'm not alone!
someguy998 8
I kept looking back and forth from this comment and the FML about 15 times until I finally read it as "Widow" (wi-doe, for those who still think its window)
jewelia13 12
Wow. Some of the comments here really make me wonder.
FaustXIII 0
Wouldn't it be just fantastic if it did, though?
fatalwish 6
wow what a total douche him and you for not going ******* marine drill sgt on his ass on the spot great idea takeing a completely drunk shit bag to a funeral disrespective ****!
nognom 2
Well... Is she good looking?