Today, I went to the store to buy groceries. I didn't care how I looked, so I wore an old shirt that said, "Thousands of my potential children died on your daughter's face last night." I ran into my girlfriend's parents at the store. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went shopping with this girl I like while my girlfriend was busy. We ended up going grocery shopping to make dinner together, and I ran into my girlfriend's parents. FML
Today, I went to my local grocery store in sweatpants and slippers to pick up some hangover food, thinking I wouldn’t run into anyone I know. I ran into my ex, her new partner, and his parents… twice. FML
Today, I, a forty year-old man, went to the store with my teenage daughter and infant son. I got some very dirty looks. FML
Today, I went clothes shopping. I took my little daughter into the dressing room while I tried some clothes on. She somehow managed to open the door while I was changing. A lady outside then bitched me out for "exposing" myself to her kids. FML
Today, my girlfriend went shopping at Victoria's Secret with me. While she was in the fitting room, her parents walked by and saw me. They don't approve of the store, so I panicked and told them I was considering becoming a woman. FML
Today, I was shopping at Costco for a romantic evening with my girlfriend, I bought some flowers, dinner, and a super pack of condoms, At the register behind me, I heard somebody say, "Good thing my daughter has a responsible boyfriend." It was my girlfriend's father. FML
Today, I was in a clothing store with my girlfriend. I saw the ugliest hat ever on a hat shelf, tried it on and said to my girlfriend, "Look at this ugly hat, it's absolutely horrible. It's even dirty." An old woman stood next to me said, "Well no wonder it's ugly, it's mine." FML
Today, I went to the store in the most awful looking pyjamas possible, ran into my crush, and he looked at me up and down and laughed. FML
Today, I went to the store with my 4-year-old daughter. While I was trying to change into tight jeans, which weren't completely on, my daughter opened the curtain and yelled, "It's the Mommy Show!" Everyone there heard her and saw me. FML
Today, I got dressed in a hurry and grabbed what I though was a basic white shirt from the clean laundry pile. It wasn’t until I stepped into the elevator at work and saw myself in the mirror that I realized I was wearing one of my girlfriend’s shirt. It was snug, had a floral pattern, and made me look like I was trying too hard to be trendy. It was a long day. FML
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Top comments
thequeenofscots 0
...Why do you even own a shirt that says that, much less wear it in public? XD. This made me laugh, but you definitely deserve it. Wear vulgar clothes, get in trouble.
unknown_shooter 0
LOVE that shirt!
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Comments (479)
schadenfreudeFTW 0
oh, that's fail XD poor you.
xXLenaXx 0
yeah poor OP, but...that is an EPIC EPIC win of a shirt :D
Meegggaaann 0
my all time favorite FML
DarkWaffle 0
LMFAO i wanna know where you got that shirt
zirathedarkelf 2
tshirthell.com sells that one.
WhoIsThe 7
Isn't that ironic.
unknown_shooter 0
LOVE that shirt!
davizv 0
agreed x1000000
be_happy1 0
haha wow that sucks
m0tl3ycru3 0
No the OP's GF does
fatfaceunited 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
you had abortions on your GFs face???
Fab0luZ 0
Your picture just about explains it all. FAIL
georgei 0
no oral sex idiot
101autie 0
Naw, sperms help make chillins... In that sense last night
101autie 0
* it sent before i said post. his potential chillins died on his girlfriends face!
ParkersGirl 0
No, he meant sperm was on the daughters' face.
thequeenofscots 0
...Why do you even own a shirt that says that, much less wear it in public? XD. This made me laugh, but you definitely deserve it. Wear vulgar clothes, get in trouble.
rasta_pasta 4
too bad that you can't appreciate that it's a free country and that people being people offends your sensibilities. i hear russia is nice this time of year.
jasondavis22 1
Don't b a hater bro, he can wear whatever he wants as long as he's wearing something
Takaishi 0
Psh, clothes are for the weak.
Mr_Rhinoceros 5
I'm with you bro.
lmmmr 0
Why the hell do you own a shirt like that? Way to find ways to be disrespectful even speaking. YDI all the way.
_apecakez 0
I want that shirt :| even though I don't produce semen, I would wear it sooo much.
101autie 0
Neither do I but i would definintly buy it too!
Mattpig 15
Wouldn't that be "Thousands of your son's potential children died on my face last night" haha
bunniex1 11
do u go to west side??
Shadic 0
Oh god, that's hilarious. Insta-Favorite for you.
adelaide_evening 0
#4- I seriously hope you were kidding. If not, I'll just explain that he was alluding to cumming on a girl's face. OP-YDI for ever wearing a shirt like that in public.
ba11in 0
that is an awesome shirt! lmao