jacko
Reserved
Today, my Platoon Sergeant caught me unshaved, so now I have to write a 1000 word essay on "The importance of shaving." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
ripo95
France
Today, I put my hand up in class. I forgot that I hadn't shaved. FML
JasonX0656
Kalamazoo, United States
Today, my fiancé asked me to do some manscaping. I got a little overzealous and now I look like a 12-year-old boy with razor burn. FML
Beardedlady
Madison, United States
Today, my mom told me that I need to shave my beard because it's getting too long. This wouldn't be so bad if it weren't for the fact that I'm a woman. FML
Buggga
Australia
Today, I was instructed to shave my back in preperation for my first tattoo. I'm a girl. FML
dogproblems
Charlotte, United States
Today, I shaved my beard in preparation for an important work conference. Now my dog won't stop growling and barking at me. FML
marisa
Carlow, Ireland
Today, I had to beg my husband not to shave his pubic hair into a handlebar moustache. FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, my boyfriend, who hasn't shaved in a month, went to go shave. I was pretty excited since his beard was starting to make my face itch whenever we kissed. When he came out of the bathroom he had a handlebar mustache. FML
Anonymous
Glendale, United States
Army dudes
Today, I received a package from my deployed husband. It contained a scarf, a letter, and a bag full of his pubes. FML
DaggerHole
This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff
Australia
Itchy arse
Today, I learned the worst part about being dared to shave your ass hair: Stubble. FML
Herbiee
United Kingdom
Back to reality
Today, I shaved off the beard I had been forced to grow over the past 3 weeks due to forgetting my razor when away. Fifteen minutes in, with half my beard gone, I realised I had got a tan everywhere but my beard. I now have a large white patch on my face. FML
Top comments
mynameisal 0
ydi for having a chin
zattele 3
it will be funnier if OP is a girl
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Comments (161)
Trollz4daLULZ 2
YDI for not shaving, Grizzly Adams. YDI for thinking 1000 words in an essay is a lot. At least it's not 1000 pushups or 1000 side-straddle hops. YDI for being an undisciplined fuckstick.
hotalbanian 0
hahahaa fuckstickkk loll
firecopy 6
I would might actually would want 1000 push ups instead of a 1000 word essay. it's less thinking when you run out of words to say about the greatness of shaving.
lalagirl912 0
just say a a a a a... the entire time, a is a word then just say I have a a a a studer! :P ps.not makig. fun of people with stuffer, cuz I think it's kinda cute lol :P
xXLenaXx 0
So do these cute people have a stuffer or a studer? Also, do you pronounce it like "stew-derr"?
BringTheHeat 0
you deserve it for not shaving.
PhillyFox 0
YDI for not shaving. Welcome to the military.
lausarndon 0
Seriously, it could have been worse. Try writing a 10,000 word essay on hydration. 1000 words is nothing, and you'd better get used to this kind of stuff being in the military.
kayluhchaos 0
who says he's in the marines? he could be in high school jrotc for all you know
lausarndon 0
Nobody said Marines. And if it's JRTC, then this guy really is a ******* pussy and needs to get over it.
seouldier13 0
JROTC*. JRTC is a training exercise at Fort Polk.
lausarndon 0
I know. Stupid Backflip.
lu95 16
well keep yourself clean shaven from now on.
gamecast21 0
bet you'll remember to shave next time hahahaha gotta love Marines :-) I've had worse punishments. copying 5 pages from a regulation handbook that turns into 11 handwritten pages. but at least I didn't have to make that up.
Tweak56 0
he never said he was in the marines there are platoon sargents in the army too
gamecast21 0
I was generalizing from my own experience.
cristy91 33
What's the likelihood he would read it? If it's not high, just create a story of an unshaved man saving a unicorn. Maybe you could start writing how if there's an alien invasion, not having a beard would make you less distinguishable in the masses... Of course that wouldn't help much if there were robots involved. How about you could just discuss how you don't look like a bum, but rather a serious man? Fyl, either way. I hate writing, so I'd be upset. Math and Science FTW!
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
I'd prefer to read a story about Amanda shaving a unicorn.
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
A man*, not Amanda. Or maybe a man named Amanda. Or an unshaven-then-shaven unicorn named Amanda.
jrenf 8
the likelihood is very high if the platoon sergeant is a good NCO. I've read every essay I ever had a soldier write.
tido140 0
Fycking plebe... Grow the **** up and shave
Garyvillines 0
atleast you don't have to satellite a formation with your "shaving kit"