Today, my boyfriend, who hasn't shaved in a month, went to go shave. I was pretty excited since his beard was starting to make my face itch whenever we kissed. When he came out of the bathroom he had a handlebar mustache. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I waxed my upper lip hair. My boyfriend later told me that he missed my mustache rubbing onto his. FML
Today, my boyfriend was shaving his beard in the bathroom when I left. An hour later, I found him exasperated after having shaved half his body. I had to help him shave every nook and cranny left because he said he was in too deep and couldn't turn back. Yes, his bumhole too. FML
Today, I was getting ready to meet my boyfriend. We haven't seen each other in a month so I decided to shave my body hair, even though I have really sensitive skin and usually end up getting rashes after a few days. His flight got cancelled and he won't be back for another two days. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he'd help me shave my mustache. I'm a girl. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were snuggling and telling eachother nice things. The nicest thing he could think of to say to me was "Well, I see you shaved your mustache." FML
Today, I had to beg my husband not to shave his pubic hair into a handlebar moustache. FML
Today, while talking to my boyfriend, I noticed he looked uncomfortable. When I asked what was wrong, he asked when the last time I shaved was. I answered, "I shaved my legs this morning." He shook his head and said, "No, I meant your face." FML
Today, I asked my boyfriend if he was growing a mustache, as he had whiskers. He looked at me and said "No, but apparently you are." FML
Today, I finally told my boyfriend I have a medical condition that makes me grow an unusual amount of hair on my face, so I shave every day. He said he was leaving me because he refuses to be with a "bearded lady". FML
Today, I told my boyfriend that I don't like his facial hair and that he should shave it off. He replied, "You first." FML
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Top comments
Cupcaken 0
I think that sounds AWESOME!
Kathy24 0
haha that's so funny! That sounds like something my fiancée would do!! lol
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Comments (213)
Cupcaken 0
I think that sounds AWESOME!
iEmily 0
Agreed. But I'd prefer a beard... what's wrong with you, OP? Beards are amazing!
Malinkrot 3
That's awesome to high school girls who think moustaches are hot because they want to get with older guys...too bad the older guys that would date high schoolers are 25 year old dropouts who work at Burger King
DirtySalamander 9
are you high?
Brave_Sir_Robin 4
I'm almost 25 and work at Burger King, although I prefer to date elementary school children...
nnero0 0
ok honestly? beards r kinda gross...
did_it_4_lulz 0
Beards aren't gross if kept at a proper length and are properly taken care of.
Americunt 0
Three cheers for molesting!
itachi5464 0
agreed
Jimbo13Jones 0
molestache!
skyboy_fml 2
I agree your bf sounds mad cool
Montacita 0
Kudos to the handlebar!
kyaquatel 0
@ 81- I almost choked on a pretzel. that's hilarious!
trickyd 0
I keep mine short and finely styled. But this man did it so you really can ride him like a bike and still feel in control. Peace out x
j2484 0
thts not an fml Justin biebers a ****** queer
silvervolt7 0
@27 HIP HIP HOORAY! HIP HIP HOORAY! HIP HIP HOORAY!
tobyraza 0
Isn't that normal there in Texas?
lillybear 0
handlebar mustaches are sexy
yhames88 0
handlebars are awesome
DrEa_IN2_ur_HART 0
@45- WIN!
Wargen 8
I agree! handlebar is the awesomeness!!!
coffeeicecream 0
THAT'S SO FREAKIN AMAZING!!!! :D totally not FML material!
Chopperman_fml 0
YDI because you didn't think it was awesome and/or hilarious. It was.
MeliJelly 0
Correction. That would be McDonalds.
MissKitKa 0
does anyone else think that men with moustaches can't be trusted? cause I've lived by that rule and it's pretty legit...I'm just sayin.
trizzieb 0
Want a moustache ride???
PaddedWhiteRoom 0
LOL
jBordeniv 0
143 I will ******* slit your god-damned throat
GrammarNaziFTW 0
Your bf is made if winning
Kathy24 0
haha that's so funny! That sounds like something my fiancée would do!! lol
BeeSkwaird 0
I sure hope you meant "fiancé," or that's really gross!!
Lawzen_Rainbow 7
FYI #2. fianceé is female. fiancé is male lol
Cupcaken 0
so what if she actually ment fiancèe? freakin homofobes
null_fml 11
It's not an issue of homophobia... if #2 meant "fiancée", as in the female version, that would imply a woman with a handlebar mustache. EDIT: pendatic beat me to the punch, as usual. Heh.
Lawzen_Rainbow 7
uhh #53 I wasn't being homophobic. I was getting at the fact that if her "fiancée" had a beard it would be gross as fiancée is female. think before u post fool
green_shade 0
The scariest part is that the "fiancée" would have to had grown it in a month. 0_0
Kathy24 0
Hey everyone, sorry, I did mean to put Fiancé but my phone auto corrects everything and put two e's for some reason. Sorry about that.
Shutsuji 3
...congratulations on third. @OP, it was probably just a joke. Ask him to shave the rest off XD
Hapsap 0
Thats awesome!
fuckyocouch 0
freakin sweet!
Rangant 7
Grow a beard so his face starts to itch and then negotiate with him; if he shaves his moustache off you'll shave ur beard.
g02hell 2
ftw
wooow_sucks_for_ 0
What about public?
div01 2
27 did u mean pubic? cuz if not i dont understand what you said
Twinklestar 0
I think "public" probably makes more sense than "pubic" 29....
Freeze_fml 17
I think "pubic" makes more sense than "public" here. *waits for huge debate*
Brave_Sir_Robin 4
#38, #44 - Rabble, rabble?
null_fml 11
My interpretation: #7 was talking about the OP, a female, growing a beard to spite him. So #27 questioned the idea of said female having a beard in public. Rage on, debate!
Brave_Sir_Robin 4
My interpretation: #27 meant to say pubic, accidentally placed an "l" to make the word "public", and now we're stuck on a pointless debate that will probably end with me sleeping with someone's sister, brother, pet goat, or all three at the same time. So let's just skip all the pointless chatter and get to the conclusion already, okay?
Freeze_fml 17
I'm with 51. Run away before Twinkle types up a huge essay response!
Rangant 7
lol, yes #50 ur interpretation of my comment was correct. lol this is cool, my 1st fml comment and a debate has begun :)
Brave_Sir_Robin 4
Congrats, Rangant. Many people may die on the Internet because of your words of wisdom and advice.
mfmylifesrsly 30
well you COULD also not shave your pubes haha thall deff get him to shave. I was gunna do that with my ex when he was considering getting cornrows.
drilher244 0
cornrows on a puss? I'd love to see that
sum1savemeh 0
@pendatic. it's funny how you have conversations on every fml with certain people. reading ur comments are the best lmao (:
x_HELLo_tHERE_x 0
What about not shaving your legs and/or underarms? That might work too.
starlover77 0
OK public and pubic, both, would b an issue.
evilspongebob 0
i think he was taking your safety in consideration so that way you dont fall off next time your riding his face. seems like a pretty cool guy to me!
Boudewijn 0
Roflmao :D I think you're right!
oNikkio 0
Haha I'd like to see how that'd work
jaddie101 0
lol
tokyohenjin 5
I grew a beard about a month ago and have been threatening my girlfriend with muttonchops ever since.
arrivezalhelico 0
27th president William H. Taft would be proud.
youngmikeeee 0
don't shave your kitty so HE will itch. lmaoo