Today, my parents woke me up at 4 am and informed me of their impending divorce. They then woke me up again three hours later and told me "never mind". This same routine happens several times a month. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, my parents woke me up by pouring a glass of freezing cold water over my head. Their reason? They were "bored". FML
Don't blame me!
Today, my parents told me they're getting a divorce because of all the strain caused by me nearly dying in an accident. FML
Today, my parents woke me up and grounded me for the "disrespectful" things I said to them in my sleep. Apparently I say these things every night, and each time I do they extend the grounding. FML
Today, just like every other day, I was woken up 2 hours earlier than I needed to be, by the alarm belonging to my upstairs neighbors. They won't wake up until their real alarm goes off: me, pounding the walls and yelling in frustration. FML
Today, I found out about my parent's divorce over Facebook from my sister who lives 8 hours away in another province. They made the decision 3 weeks ago. I live with my parents. FML
Great gift
Today, two days before my birthday, my parents drove three hours to visit me at school and take me out to lunch. I assumed that it was to celebrate my birthday. They told me they are getting divorced. FML
Team Insomnia
Today, my parents made me wake up at 7 a.m., like every morning. When I woke up exhausted, my mom rolled her eyes and said, "It’s called going to bed earlier." I went to bed at 10 p.m. last night. I fell asleep at 5 am. FML
Hey, well, happy birthday anyway
Today, my parents took me out to dinner. I thought they were taking me because it's my birthday. Turns out they are getting divorced. They forgot it was my birthday. FML
Today, like every day, I woke up at 3 in the morning because my roommate needs "a three hour warning" before his real alarm goes off. His alarm is a constant beeping noise which he always ignores for a good 10 minutes before finally getting up and turning it off. FML
Control
Today, I moved out of my parents' house and started living alone. All of a sudden, my parents started requiring me to text or call them every 5 minutes to tell them where I am and what I'm doing, from 6am to 12am every day. If I don't, they will go looking for me, and force me to move back in with them. FML
Top comments
majorbob10 0
Some parents you got there. FYL
asoptavlo14 6
No, because clearly the FML stated they were arguing at noon. Lol yes that late.
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Comments (155)
Badtz_maru_fml 0
I love Ryan Higa too.
sourgirl101 29
TEEHEE
Youdrongo 0
1) They have bad sex 2) They tell you they're going to have a divorce 3) They have amazing make up sex 4) "Never mind."
Bizzzy 5
Play a bad prank, say you need to go to the hospital, then say nevermind.
perdix 31
It's not even make-up sex, it's angry sex! It's not just that your mom want your dad's **** in her, heck, he'd give her that whenever she wants. She wants it to be hot and throbbing while her pussy has gotten hot, swollen and wet from the fighting. Sorry about losing sleep because of their sex game, but I think the images that are going to appear in your dreams will make it so you never want to sleep again.
AnonymousOne234 3
your dad can last three hours? damn..
xrainbowshadowx 17
They say make-up sex is the best.
sourgirl101 29
Your parents involving you so often sounds like they are using you as a pawn to hurt the other. FYL OP, my folks tried dragging me into their fights growing up too.
Mxpxdude189 0
your parents are assholes
ImDeathRow_fml 0
Any makeup sex?
bc4025567575 3
Yikes that must suck.