Today, my new girlfriend's father made good on his "What you do to her I do to you" threat when he took me out for drinks and then drunkenly hit on me. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my first time meeting my girlfriend's dad ended with him chasing me from his house and trying to hit me with a baseball bat. FML
Today, I found out that my father, who very recently lost his wife, decided that drunkenly hitting on my long-time boyfriend's mom was a good idea. FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's mom. She went on about how my girlfriend's dad is a no good drunk, following this statement with spilling her fifth glass of wine. FML
Today, during dinner, my new girlfriend's father stroked my leg several times under the table with his bare foot. FML
Today, my dad got so drunk that he proposed to me. FML
Today, I had to physically restrain my girlfriend from assaulting my father after he drunkenly poked her in the ribs for the fifth time. FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's dad. It didn't go well since unfortunately he’s the guy I had to remove from the club I’m the bouncer at, and had to report to the police for getting drunk, stroking himself over his pants and taking photos in the ladies toilets. FML
Today, my "future" wife got drunk in front of my parents, who she was meeting for the first time. She called my dad a piece of shit and told my mom she wants to tear her own eyes out. FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time. As I shook her father's hand, he squeezed with an ungodly amount of force, leaned in with a smile, and murmured that my balls will be the next thing he'll crush if his daughter ever complains about me. FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's dad for the first time. His shirt said "D.A.D.D, Dads Against Daughters Dating, shoot the first one and word will spread". FML
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Top comments
Kitten_love 22
I honestly saw this going a completely different and horrible direction.
HoboMeth 36
Don't do anal
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Comments (72)
Weirddate 11
I you drunkenly hit her then YDI!
heyLaddieHey 18
"Hit ON" as in flirt. Not hit.
ohsnapword 21
Your new girlfriend's father sounds like he has a good sense of humor.
wonandonly 11
I thought OP meant physically hit. I was about to smash that YDI button but then I read the post again lol.
Justincolon22 15
Can't beat free drinks :)
GuyOnBridge 14
the Internet has ruined me, the first thing I thought of when reading first few words were anal sex, and lube.
Logical07 16
What about oral?
HeatherCorinne 14
Your girlfriend's dad might be a little gay
Rababco 29
I'm guessing he was just messing around and getting back at OP for flirting with his daughter. That's how I read it anyway.
barlos88 19
Now is the perfect time to start showering her in gifts, yes it may get a little gay, but hey you might be able to get some free stuff out of it
Elban 20
Next time on Maury, "My father stole my boyfriend and wants me to give him away at the wedding"
crobar 4
Best comment ever!
John_in_Oz 12
Top marks for your phrasing and story-telling skills. Still, there's a difference in the comments between those who think the Dad was hitting on you because he fancied you and those who thought he was hitting on you in retaliation for hitting on his daughter. I got the impression the Dad genuinely fancied you, but am I right?