Today, my mother told me it's okay to be a prostitute, as long as I make sure the clients pay a lot. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my mother told her friends that I work as a call girl. I'm a call center agent. FML
Today, after months of helping my mother with bills because she claimed she had no money, I found out she makes way more than what I do. She just wanted my money for alcohol and drugs. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me that my mom paid him to date me. FML
Today, my mom told me she's a drug addict, sold my bed to buy meth, and then lectured me about how I should be okay with it. FML
Today, when I came out to my family, my mom told me in all seriousness she’d rather me be a prostitute than a lesbian. She added, “At least prostitutes have sex with men.” When I pointed out that lesbians can also be prostitutes, she kicked me out of the house. She’s changed the locks. FML
Today, I was joking to mom that at the rate I’m going I’ll have to start an OnlyFans to afford college next year. She shrugged like it was nothing because apparently prostitution got her through college and bought her her first house before she accidentally got pregnant with me. Um, WHAT? FML
Today, I finally realized that the only time my mother talks to me is when she needs money. FML
Today, I found out my mother has enough toys to open a sex shop. FML
Today, my mother told me I looked like a hooker in my wedding dress. Thanks mommy. FML
Today, my mother won't let me intern at a prestigious college, working with graduate students and professors, and being paid, because she doesn't want to drive me. FML
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Top comments
goldfishgod 20
Listen to your mom, she has a point.
GRRSOM 7
Prositive influence
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Comments (144)
loserman67 36
Nothing like some good motherly advice. Did she also tell you that it's okay to shoot smack into your arms just as long as you buy the good stuff and not the stuff the dealer stepped on with talcum powder?Did she also tell you it's okay to text and speed and not wear a seatbelt just as long as you kept your drinking to two six packs? Did she also tell you that it okay to make a hard core anal porno / snuff film just so long as the camera angles get your best side? Did she also tell you that sex with your father is okay, just as long as you don't do it better than her? I think you need to move away from mom as soon as possible
G0odgrief 0
at least she thinks people would be willing to pay good money to have sex with you
triggerit 5
Op and her mom must be crazy... One couse of her advise... The other couse of asking of advise from such a *****...
metalwolf 17
Exactly, everyone knows asking your parents for advice is a bad idea. /sarcasm
downtime 13
As opposed to taking advice from someone with the english skills of an underdeveloped primate.
totalloss 7
Smart woman.
naduskalove 3
WTF .... ? Damn , and i thought that my mom can be extreme sometimes ...
geod69 8
How much you charging
ImGonnaDieAlone 5
Mother knows best...
Sanch101 7
You can only charge a lot if you are really hot. In a way this was a compliment from your mother.
stepymac 15
That's bad parenting !!!!!
Calyx_fml 22
The little dirty secret is that even high end call girls get smacked around by psycho clients every once in a while. It's a dangerous profession regardless of the pay. The only safe way to do it is incall with a martial artist body guard in the next room.