Today, my mother told me it's okay to be a prostitute, as long as I make sure the clients pay a lot. FML
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Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my mother told her friends that I work as a call girl. I'm a call center agent. FML
Today, after months of helping my mother with bills because she claimed she had no money, I found out she makes way more than what I do. She just wanted my money for alcohol and drugs. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me that my mom paid him to date me. FML
Today, my mom told me she's a drug addict, sold my bed to buy meth, and then lectured me about how I should be okay with it. FML
Today, when I came out to my family, my mom told me in all seriousness she’d rather me be a prostitute than a lesbian. She added, “At least prostitutes have sex with men.” When I pointed out that lesbians can also be prostitutes, she kicked me out of the house. She’s changed the locks. FML
Today, I was joking to mom that at the rate I’m going I’ll have to start an OnlyFans to afford college next year. She shrugged like it was nothing because apparently prostitution got her through college and bought her her first house before she accidentally got pregnant with me. Um, WHAT? FML
Today, I finally realized that the only time my mother talks to me is when she needs money. FML
Today, I found out my mother has enough toys to open a sex shop. FML
Today, my mother told me I looked like a hooker in my wedding dress. Thanks mommy. FML
Today, my mother won't let me intern at a prestigious college, working with graduate students and professors, and being paid, because she doesn't want to drive me. FML
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Top comments
goldfishgod 20
Listen to your mom, she has a point.
GRRSOM 7
Prositive influence
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Comments (144)
goldfishgod 20
Listen to your mom, she has a point.
thiscrazything 1
True, so hard to find those good paying jobs these days.
leprechaun23 15
And don't forget to make sure they use a condom
SultanRS 12
I guess she has to keep up the family business.
kaplan_reject 5
Family business huh? Guess you could say moms the manager at the "box office".
tygerarmy 35
Goldfish your shirt goes so well with your comment.
CareFace 16
1- best profile pic on FML.
niadanac1 3
Top end escorts make more then doctors. Plus you can make more money earlier. No student loans. Positive interest flow from the bank and inventments. Your mom may be smarter than us all.
Marteeny23 19
28- I loveee your picture
Marteeny23 19
But get out before your 35 it all goes down hill from there. I learned that from A. C. Hookers.
csickcman 11
op, asl?
Annpop 1
Hold on u said ur mom said its ok to be a prostitute...... Does that mean u have asked her before? Either way shes an idiot.. Feel srry for u OP :€
ComTlancy 12
If one was to become a call girl and was able to stay clean of drugs and STDs, then I see no problem with it. Society has just put a stigma on pleasure that needs to be removed. For example, some girls openly admit to enjoying sex and having lots of it but are frowned upon and called a ****. Sex is a beautiful thing. Why do we have to frown upon something that is so natural and great?
downtime 13
89, It's not the best profession simply because of the treatment of the workers, the lack of regulation, legal standing, as well as the health risk. Not that I think people shouldn't do it if they feel it's what they want to do, but that would be a reason as to why it wouldn't be a first choice in career paths.
22cute 17
98 Not really true. A woman who is self assured can choose to reject unpleasant clients, set her own rules and throw out anyone who won't play by them.
ohSNAPyall 27
106 ...In an ideal world. In reality, rejecting someone could get you ****** up, or so I'd imagine.
downtime 13
106, How would you identify an unpleasant client prior to engaging with them? Beyond which point the laws are a little wish washy. Legalising it would solve almost all of the mentioned issues though.
ComTlancy 12
I believe in Belgium, prostitution is a commercial industry complete with laws and regulations, monitored by the government. That's one way of killing the stigma; putting a spotlight on it.
22cute 17
It's also legal in Navada. And to answer questions, you can rule out a lot of nasty types by emailing, by setting up your own website where you state your terms, by offering a high quality experience and gently explaining you need to stay in the "drivers" seat, by charging what your time is worth, and by following your instincts. Good men pay for sexual experiences too, so knowing you don't have to put up with losers helps a woman weed them out.
GRRSOM 7
Prositive influence
ladyLALAA 29
I'm sure it will make for a prosperous future...
Heinousness 0
This will probably happen. That is, if she can't find that special someone, which is just as probable.
lonkite101 14
...
MerrikBarbarian 9
81- you do know many sex workers are happily married right?
Heinousness 0
Yes. I'm making a point.(not sarcastic)
vi3tno_romeo 5
Ur mum is not normal
LightningCactus 12
You're right, shes not normal, she's smart.
Heinousness 0
Yeah she is!!!!(not sarcastic)
blcksocks 19
You don't look that normal either....
r0ckoman 0
no shit Sherlock
lonkite101 14
You don't look to normal yourself... Hehehe
whattheforkdude 0
U DON'T SAY?
linkinpark98 24
I hope this isn't coming from your mother's experiences…
Dracoboxer357 36
Your mother told you this? Seriously? Glad to see she has your best interests at heart. :p FYL, OP. Really, that's sad. :(
waratmars 10
why is it sad? i'd appreciate my mom for thinking about my financial future.
Dracoboxer357 36
61- I'd appreciate my parents thinking about my financial future too, but I'd hope pimping my own ass wasn't my only or best option to make any money for a living! ;) When I was a teen, my dad sat me down with college courses being offered in my field of interest, and the topic of "if all else fails, bend over or blow it" never really came up. ;) Bleh. (Okay, if some damn fool walks up to me with a suitcase full of money, maybe we'd talk, but since that hasn't happened yet......)
onlychildFTW 34
Being a prostitute is one very well paying job, if you have the looks and stamina for it. You could make wicked cash. No taxes too because its cash :P lol. Just always be careful and make sure protection is used. You don't need a baby, or STD.
Heinousness 0
77, you're right. Though I don't like the idea of prostitutes
22cute 17
So don't hire one.
Heinousness 0
Touché
BunBunBabe 8
Not the best advice to give anyone, but it sounds like she just wants to make sure you have a secure future haha
Dracoboxer357 36
^ 6- Secure future? Cause the old age pension and retirement package for prostitutes is just stunning, is it? ;)
Llamacod 11
Just as good as any other job one can get without a decent college education.
br0ccoli 15
8 - i heard that high-end escorts usually charge $40,000 a night. That's just the mid-range of the high-end. Sounds secure to me. You could retire after a year!
BunBunBabe 8
Haha you're all right, because you can make a lot being a high-end escort but who is to say they save/invest that money wisely? Definitely no benefits like retirement and still risk of STDs.. Worth it for very few
ShyAnn29 15
Wow, not the best motherly advice
blcksocks 19
She has her daughter's best interests at heart.
cp41cool101 4
Well atleast she approves it?? Make mommy proud
vintagemeow 6
No no, you've got it all wrong. See in her day, 'hooker' meant professional salmon fishing guide.
twilightluvr101 4
You picture just goes perfect with your contenrt lol
omgawshglee 4
.
metalwolf 17
Somehow I doubt she just randomly said it. Seems to be only part of the story here.
geon_olam 17
What, an FML taken out of context??!!!