Today, my mom wouldn't let me go to the YMCA pool with the rest of the family. She said that the sound my thighs make when they rub together is "embarrassing". FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my mother asked me why I disliked her and my father's nakedness in the family pool. FML
Today, I told my mom I was going swimming with friends. She told me, in front of them, not to go into the deep end unless there was an adult around because I'm not old enough to swim on my own. I'm 19. FML
Today, I had to explain to my 65-year-old mother that it is inappropriate for her to walk around in front of me in her underwear. Her response? "Too bad." FML
Today, my mother threatened me if I keep wearing yoga pants to school, she's going to have my dad pick me up in a speedo. FML
Today, I took my 4-year-old daughter to the local pool for swim lessons. As we walked onto the deck she turned to me and said "Mom, that lady has really big boobs!" The whole pool heard, even the man my daughter was referring to. FML
Today, my family and I attended a pool party. I never learned to swim, so I didn't bring a suit. When someone asked why I wasn't in the pool, my sister replied in a loud voice, "She's on her period and didn't want the pool to get dirty!" Thanks. FML
Today, I went skinny dipping with a few friends at my friend's house. It was really fun until one of my friends shrieked, saying there were bugs in the pool. Everyone jumped out and looked at her. Turns out the "bugs" she saw was my body hair. FML
Today, I decided to get back in shape so I went swimming. I only managed 10 lengths and was completely out of breath. I was so embarrassed that when a lifeguard asked me if I was OK, I made up a story about a leg injury as a reason to leave only 15 minutes after I got in. FML
Today, I took my two-year-old daughter swimming. While sitting in the hot tub, my daughter pointed to the elderly man sitting across from us and mumbled something. I couldn't understand her, so I asked her to repeat it. After two more attempts, she shouted, "MOM! He has big boobs!" FML
Today, I took my daughter to the library instead of the pool. I sat her on the counter and, while I reached for my library card, she turned to the librarian and said, "We didn't go to the pool today because Mum has hairy legs." FML
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Top comments
MichaelDeSanta 20
What a bitch.
Attacksloth 33
Don't invite her to the next event you host because the sound her lips and vocal chords make are embarrassing.
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Comments (107)
IWishIWasObama 12
tell her the ymca has great treadmills
ImTheAlpha 30
Wait so your mother thinks your thighs are too big and she's preventing you from exercising. /sarcasm that makes perfect sense. /end sarcasm Anyway, try to sneak in anyway, or do something to get her back. Or ignore me because I have terrible advice :D
ThePols 11
Guess it's not so fun to stay at the Y M C A a.
DoubleDosexo 12
My mom would probably hate me if my thighs didn't rub together. I'm sorry about your mother. or whatever you'd like to call her now.
iseebearbears 27
Wow, has your mom even been to a YMCA pool? All you see there are fat ***** there with double chins and three stomachs.
orangeink25 3
baby got back
Oyas12 14
Well, she raised You so...
StellaNox 16
What kind of a mother says that? O.o Fyl, OP :-/
m9199 11
YDI fir having legs.
Markrob 7
That's ****** up