Today, I was having a race with a little kid. I let him win to make him feel like a champion. After the race, he turned to me and said, "Maybe if you weren't so fat you would have won." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was babysitting, and we were playing a game. Because he was little, I let him win all the games. He then turned to me and said, "You're really bad at this." I got very defensive and won the next game, and was actually proud that I beat a 3-year-old. FML
Today, my friend was complaining about how fat she was. To make her feel better I said, "Psh, you're not fat! In fact we're about the same weight!" She looked at me for a second, then burst into tears sobbing, "I'm fat! I'm fat!" FML
Today, after months of exercise and diets and finally reaching my ideal weight, I told my morbidly obese cousin about my success, hoping to motivate him to do the same. He replied, "Why would it matter, you're still ugly." FML
Today, I achieved a personal goal by completing a half-marathon for charity, despite being overweight and unfit before training. When I finished I cried, not because I was proud of myself, but because I ran the last two miles while being followed by kids on bicycles calling me a "fat cunt". FML
Today, I told my mom I wanted to try out for the track team. Her exact words were "good luck, fatty". FML
Today, my cousin asked me what it's like to be so fat. I chastised him and said that was a rude thing to ask. He apologized, then asked me what it's like to be such a pussy. He didn't stop until he, a 10 year-old kid, had reduced me, a 26 year-old woman, to tears. FML
Today, I was watching my 7 year-old daughter and her friend jump on our trampoline. I was really impressed by all the flips they were doing, and I told her, "Hey! I can't even do that." To that her friend replied, "Of course you can't. You're fat!" FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were play-fighting. I managed to pin him down and win. He saw my grin, snorted, and bitterly said I'd only won because, "let's face it, you're a bit of a porker, eh babe?" FML
Today, I was at the gym, when a pretty overweight guy started staring and eventually taunting me. Let me tell you, lines such as "Lay off the cake, fatty!" and "I can see your gut hanging out your ass, for fuck's sake!" don't exactly boost one's self-confidence. FML
Today, my son was looking through old photos and showed me a picture of myself and asked who it was. When I told him it was me, he responded by saying "But mommy, the lady in the picture is not fat!" FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Doortje 30
What a ******* brat.
boofgall 16
"Rematch". Then show his shit up.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (101)
Doortje 30
What a ******* brat.
detroitsucks247 3
Tell his mom, that scares little kids like no other.
hotshot2626 9
Seriously, a lot of little kids these days ( up to and including some teens), act like asshats. Now maybe the kid is like 4. If so explain to him that saying things like that can be hurtful.
just_dandy20 2
#13 I agree with your comment, but if that child is 4 saying crap like that. Well I don't think you explaining that it hurt your feelings will matter. Because they've already started being a little shit.
WhoSaidThatIsh 13
#1 - You're being too nice. That kid is an asshole in training.
Kallian_fml 21
Speaking from experience as an early childhood educator: If that child was below school age and talking like that, you've really only got the parents to blame (even if it wasn't the parents that taught it, I'd say it's the parents fault for exposing him to people that would teach him that). The second possibility is that he genuinely didn't know that would be hurtful, and was just using a describing word (fat) that he had learned in another context.
agonydrum 7
Mmm bratwurst
Inheritance 10
Challenge him to a rematch and kick his ass.
walmartpaysme 15
7, that might not help. Some parents simply do not care. They would think OP was just being overly sensitive.
detroitsucks247 3
Thats true, I was being more sarcastic than serious.
Hershey903 5
And if he would've lost, he woulda cried for your victory. Lose-lose situation.
WhyCantIDoRight 5
7 and 15 your pictures are ******* hilarious!
WhyCantIDoRight 5
I meant 7 and 16
ChaCerCam 14
rule number #1 with children, win then compliment them like "I wasn't sure if I was going to win that one, dang you're are fast."
BeforeItWasCool 12
Don't take it to heart, OP. Kids say a lot of spiteful crap.
TheTwistedOtaku 16
I agree, kids these days have no respect. I wish their parents would've raised them right...
Pretty_Pink_Lady 10
The other day I told my little cousin that my boyfriend broke up with me. He said "well that's probably because you're really ugly." Half of me found it funny. The other half almost cried.
agonydrum 7
Kids have always been painfully honest, at least the child was outside running instead of inside eating and playing Xbox...
Prolux_fml 23
First of all, that's not being painfully honest, that's being a little ******* shit, and second of all, does it really matter if he was playing Xbox? Does them new fancy machineries give you the creeps?
just_dandy20 2
I would have "accidentally" had a spasm and kicked his ass in the head.
ClassyCommando 13
His ass has a head?
mfischer 17
Kicking a child. That'll make you the better person, won't it?
xXUND3ADcityXx 0
I'd beat his ass and THEN see who he's calling fat lol
dmeach 3
You can't kick his ass in the head...it's physically not possible
Meme1988 18
Bad winner! You could not see that coming..
boofgall 16
"Rematch". Then show his shit up.
ClassyCommando 13
Then do the Usain Bolt pose.
ALlamaOnFire 20
Or the Mo Farah!
Liamj774 36
Or the Pre
Airman1988 9
Tell him that maybe if his mother had swallowed the world could have been spared from yet another obnoxious child.
sonicgreg 12
I wouldn't even talk to a 4 year old with such incoherent sentences...
MidnaLink 35
41 What does incoherent mean to you? Because I understood that perfectly.
Airman1988 9
Also where does it say he was four?
ambear26 14
It was incoherent because it needed a comma after swallowed. Not being a grammar nazi or anything. Just saying I had to read it twice. I thought he was saying that the kids mother swallowed the world.
Malice7414 0
Exactly what I was thinking
Airman1988 9
Most intelligent people could realize it was common slight grammar error, and still understood the sentence in the end. Calling it incomprehensible is a little extreme, damn grammar Nazis are getting ridiculous.
annie_nk 23
I have a feeling if you had won, the kid would throw a fit and/or be a sore loser.
LarryLaDouche 13
So? Establish dominance and the fact that he can't win all the time.
annie_nk 23
He should have won to teach the kid you can't win everything and life isn't fair.
FarSide 23
Should have tripped the little bugger as they were about to win.
The_Big_Boss 20
You let him win? Don't lie to me, lie to the cops
Elisabethandrine 29
Oh my god. Kids these days, always saying hurtfull things and beeing such brats.. Just, give him the middle finger and say that when he grows up, he will be even fatter : D
trg568 7
*being
bryan788 29
You should have sat on the little shit
sunnyt 5
Whole new meaning to 'babysitting'.