Today, I decided to get back in shape so I went swimming. I only managed 10 lengths and was completely out of breath. I was so embarrassed that when a lifeguard asked me if I was OK, I made up a story about a leg injury as a reason to leave only 15 minutes after I got in. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I decided to go swimming. I knew my technique would be off because I haven't swam since high school. It was when I made it only halfway across the pool that the lifeguard decided to jump in and save me. I wasn't drowning or struggling. FML
Today, I was in swimming practice at the pool. I suddenly got breathless, dizzy, and felt like I was drowning. I cried out to the instructor, telling him I had a weak heart. He shouted back, "I don't care about your love life! Swim, bitch!" FML
Today, at the pool, I tried to impress the hot lifeguard by doing the perfect dive. Afterward, I realized my shorts were floating through the water. FML
Today, on a date, I told the guy I could swim. He suggested we race. I agreed to impress him. I jumped in, immediately panicked, inhaled water, and had to be helped out by a 10-year-old with floaties. He asked if I lied about anything else. FML
Today, I went to the pool. When I hit the water the top of my swimsuit came off so I tried to put it on underwater. The lifeguard thought I was drowning and pulled me out in front of everyone. Topless. FML
Today, I went swimming at a public pool. When I dove in, my speedos decided they’d had enough of me and slipped right off. I spent a minute underwater debating my life choices before realizing they’d floated to the shallow end, right next to a group of giggling kids. FML
Today, I nearly drowned. I was at a wave pool for the first time and stupidly swam out to the deep end. When the waves turned on, I discovered I can't swim in rough water. Despite my yelling, "Help!" and flailing around, the lifeguard paid me no attention. My friend had to save me. FML
Today, I decided to get in shape for swimsuit season, so I went to the gym. I tried to lift a barbell up and over my head, which was fine, until I dropped it. Exercise earned me a concussion and a neck brace. FML
Today, in my lifeguarding course, I had to pull a 200-pound boy out of the pool in an exercise to practice using our legs when lifting. I, being only 90 pounds, tried pulling and ended up falling into the pool, landing with my lady parts on his face. FML
Today, I was swimming at the water park, when out of nowhere a lifeguard bombed into the pool, grabbed me, and hauled me to the surface, running his hands over my chest in the process. Apparently, the way I swim makes it look like I'm in my drowning death throes. FML
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Top comments
TonierShadow 19
It's perfectly fine. Just remember it is going to take you some time to get back in to things especially with more vigorous exercises like swimming. Wish you the best of luck with getting back into shape.
james_logan 19
10 lengths? That's pretty good! I would be tired after 10 lengths as well. Next time maybe after the 10 lengths take a break to catch your breath and do another 10 lengths. Never give up. Never back down. You can do it bro!
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Comments (52)
warrior2 20
Now you just have to actually injure your leg
TonierShadow 19
It's perfectly fine. Just remember it is going to take you some time to get back in to things especially with more vigorous exercises like swimming. Wish you the best of luck with getting back into shape.
Jatok 17
Swimming is actually less rigorous because it's easier to move your body through water. It feels more difficult because most people have poor form (not saying I have good form, mine's OK at best). To get a good swim workout you have to be in there for a bit.
ThrottleJockey 36
It's easier to move through air than it is water. That's why swimming is a type of water RESISTANCE exercise.
Jatok 17
Uhmmm, no? Have you done any research about working out? Swimming, specifically? Obviously not, and I'm talking to downvoters too. If you had, you'd know that I am, in fact, correct and not talking out of my ass.
TonierShadow 19
It is actually scientifically harder to move through water than air. In water, the molecules are closer together than in air creating a greater resistance.
ezrocks4u 29
Just tell him your perception of time is vastly different than his, as you experienced two full rotations of the earth while swimming. :p
rockeditionbarbi 14
Hey, at least you're trying! Don't beat yourself up, OP.
james_logan 19
10 lengths? That's pretty good! I would be tired after 10 lengths as well. Next time maybe after the 10 lengths take a break to catch your breath and do another 10 lengths. Never give up. Never back down. You can do it bro!
mebad_fml 18
Is a length the length of a pool?
IHaveThePower 18
This. You did your first 15 minutes--great job! Come back tomorrow and do another 15. Work your way up. Slow and steady gets you back in shape.
TheGamingGamer 28
That sucks Op! I hope you get in shape soon.
ThunderLightTSV 31
Well I mean, you tried, and that's all that matters, right?
RememberSchlitz 9
Keep at it. Tomorrow: 12 lengths. "Pain is weakness leaving the body" or something.
nanner6206 24
sweat, is burning fat crying. lol. I can't remember who told me.
Pauline96_fml 20
No, he should rest tomorrow. If you do too many intense workouts in too short of a time span then you run the risk of injury
JuokasKurvas 5
10 lengths is nothing to be ashamed of. Maybe next time try to see if setting a more more moderate pace leaves you less out of breath. As long as you don't push yourself to exhaustion there's nothing wrong with taking a short rest in between laps until you are ready to go again, even if that means a rest every 10 laps.
Rismint 6
It's alright! I just started swimming again 5 weeks ago and only did 8-10 lengths 4 times week, but you'llbe surprised how fast you can manage more! Now I can easily do 25, and I feel great! You should be proud of yourself, because I sure am. Keep going, it's worth it. You're worth it :)