Today, my mom walked in on me masturbating. She didnt look away and we stared at each other for a while; then she asked me what I wanted from McDonalds. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my mom came in my bedroom without knocking, even though I'd told her to, and caught me masturbating. She stood there in awkward silence before saying, "…Dinner's ready at 6." and left. FML
Today, my mother caught me masturbating. Trying to defuse the awkward tension, I said "Oh, I was just thinking about you!" Not a good idea. FML
Today, my mom walked in on me jerking it in her bathroom. I'm a 40 year-old man and she's 68. FML
Today, my mom caught me talking to my penis. FML
Today, I walked in on my mom masturbating. I want to run away. I feel violated. FML
Today, I was in my room with the door locked and my mom knocked on the door. I said "don't come in, i'm naked!" She said "That's okay!" so she unlocked the door and walked in. I was masturbating. FML
Today, I walked in on my mother rubbing one out. For the third time. I then had to explain to her, also for the third time, why pleasuring herself in the living room is inappropriate. FML
Today, my mom opens at McDonald's, and I go with her to chill before walking to the bus stop. The lobby was closed. I had to shit so bad, I was knocking on the door, and usually they let me in, but nobody noticed. I had to shit so incredibly bad. so… I went into the car and found an old McDonald's cup and some napkins… FML
Today, as I walked into McDonald's with my mom, she glanced at me and said, "Smells like your future." FML
Today, my soon-to-be mother-in-law walked in on me masturbating, in my own house. FML
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Top comments
SkoomaKi 28
You should have finished like a man in front of her. What's even more awkward is that she stared. Incest?
sparklemuffin 8
lol what a win
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Comments (319)
Eiregal2 10
These fmls always amaze me! Believe it or not but even here in the very backwards slow moving little universe we call "ireland" we have locks on doors. What happened in your universe that made these seemingly vanish completely??
Rainbow35 6
I live in Ireland too. xD I used to never be allowed have a lock on my door, because apparently it meant I was "hiding things". Then we moved into a house where all the doors have locks, but whenever I lock my door my mum keeps asking me if I'm okay and what I'm doing, and telling me to unlock it, so there's really no point.
luccmon 6
Maybe she was stunned by the surprising size of your genitals.. Big or small..
shutupanddance 0
Mom: What do you want fro- OHMYGOD!!! OP: Mom! Mom: ... OP: ... Mom: ...Er, what do you want from Mcdonalds? OP: Uh ... A hot dog...? Mom: With a vanilla milkshake?
alwaysHAPPY116 0
Lol, did she talk to u after that?
PurpleCabbage 1
Maybe you wanted the fish sandwich.. Some times I swear the sauce is **** :/
TheThree 0
Did you ask for the pickles in between the bun and then scream at her to tell them to squirt the mayonnaise on the edges of the meat?
harof1c 0
Wow that's umm... Uhhh.... Dude lock the door or put a sign that says knock first. P.S. She should know better
kickuwithmyfist 1
Life changing:)
rcgirl2 11
Good thing she didn't go to Weinerschnitzel.
sushant96 5
Lool wtf