Today, my mom's obsession with cleanliness hit a new low when she bitched at me for having trash in my trash can. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my mom told me to take the trash out. I started to, but then I saw that the trash can had been rolled out to the curb, so I went to my room to put on shoes. My mom apparently took this as me deciding not to take the trash out, as she not only yelled at me, but growled and hissed as well. FML
Today, I decided to clean the whole house as a surprise for my mother. When she came home, she screamed at me and called me a bitch because she had wanted to clean it herself. FML
Today, my obsessive-compulsive mother barred me from using the toilet she had just cleaned. She told me to wait until tomorrow. FML
Today, my mother called me, telling me how disappointed she was at how I let my room "become such a pigsty." I haven't lived there in three years. FML
Today, my mom told me to clean the house up because she wants to make good impression on the cleaning lady. FML
Today, my mom yelled at me for not pooping with the bathroom door open like the rest of the family. FML
Today, I was called gross by my mother for not cleaning my bathroom. I normally clean it every day, but today it looked clean, and I really needed a break. FML
Today, I found out my mother cleans the dishes with bathroom cleaning chemicals. She doesn't see anything wrong with this. FML
Today, my mother called me a "wasteful child" because I threw up my lunch. FML
Today, I was formally diagnosed with obsessive-compulsive tendencies. My mom saw this as an excuse to make me clean the whole house top to bottom, because "Hey, you love to clean." FML
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Top comments
bearstyle22 11
Was it over flowing?
iop330 22
Well it's simple. Take out the trash. (The trash being your mom)
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Comments (53)
bearstyle22 11
Was it over flowing?
gsam99 20
^^ That's the only reason I can imagine anyone's mom would do that. In which case, YDI.
Brandi_Faith 34
Those were my thoughts too. I find it more likely that the garbage can was overflowing or smelly or something, as oppose to op's mom freaking out because there was one piece of paper in it. I can totally picture the average messy teenager writing this FML when it was merely time to empty the trash can cause it was getting full or because garbage day was that day or something.
iop330 22
Well it's simple. Take out the trash. (The trash being your mom)
MrConcise 35
Can I take out your comment? I'm sorry, that wasn't nice. But neither was your comment about OP's mom.
UH60 26
If she's living in her Mom's ******* house, I don't think she can take out the 'trash being her mom'. What kind of stupid shit comment is this #2. Her Mom might be over the top, but this is one of the shittiest most ungrateful comments I've ever read. I might be getting over the top myself, about how this somewhat irrationally pissed me off; but show some god damned respect to your parents. My situation is my own, not everyone's got great parents, or parents at all; but everything I thought was 'stupid' as a kid made me one hell of a person now. Douche.
iop330 22
It's called a joke, you fools.
MrConcise 35
Clearly wasn't a good one.
tossaway2321 5
First off the author has his gender as a guy and second by the way he says "MY trash can" I'd assume it's his house, not his moms
buddy_J 16
You realize that people have their own cans in their own room while still living with their parents. Even if they are just a kid still..... @#16
doctorhook86 25
#2 was funny. Some of the rest of y'all are way too serious.
sky413 26
Woah, calm your **** #5, it's a joke, like most of the comments on FML
brand125 17
5 - please get a life..
smokecloud_ 37
I really want to know what 5 said. :(
kickyourtitsin 12
http://i.word.com/idictionary/joke Link do the definition of joke.
SBurrke 11
"Ohhhh he said she ain't got no nipples!"
EvilLittleGirl 24
my mom yelled at me for the junk in my jeans so yeaaa..
meli1195 31
At least your mom didn't yell at you about how you're not a real woman just because you don't clean all the time...
skippydoda 32
What was in the trash? How much trash? How long since you last took it out? Why am I asking this many questions about trash?
russfml 31
This post reminds me of pulp fiction when the wolf comes to clean up the mess
FAKECRASH59 15
To get back to her, start fake/real sneezing when she's near. It'll freak her out
Smooth_Criminal 24
OP didn't say that his mom is a germaphobe.
gracehi 33
Reminds me of "A" school. (US Navy job specific training after boot camp, for those who don't know.) I got written up for having trash in the trash can in my barracks room during a random room inspection. They claim that trash in the trash can attracts bugs. The thing is, it wasn't even food waste. It was just paper trash. And they had this dumb rule that you could only take your trash out to the dumpster before 7am, but then they also forbade anyone having trash in their trash can at any time. Well what the **** are you supposed to do with trash after 7am? I guess they were preparing us for the immense no-win bull shit we deal with in the fleet.
juturnaamo 29
This post made me think of the military too. My platoon sergeant told me to council one of my soldiers for having a couple of items in his trash can when they did a surprise inspection after PT. Yeah, I forgot to write that one.
smalltownman 15
No matter what you do. You will not win. The FMF is the place nightmares are born. I didn't have a single day I didn't get my ass chewed for something retarded until after I picked up sgt. The marine corps is retarded when it comes to shit like that. I had to make my marines police call ******* sand in Afghanistan for christmas sake. shit dumb sometimes. lol
bl865ood 17
I hope it wasn't just a wrapper or one item...
Louie_217 9
a sad day for you Haha
MondRubberduck 24
I'm a clean person myself, But this... this is ridiculous hahaha
ber4fun 23
I'd take this any day over having to live with a mother who is a hoarder and keeps everything filthy like my mom does.
Attacksloth 33
This looks like a job for Osama Bin Emptyin! Okay, I'll see myself out.