Today, my mom added me on Facebook. She wrote on my wall, for the whole world to see, "Why are you swearing on the internet?! You're grounded". FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I checked my Facebook to find I had been tagged in a bunch of photos from a party I had attended last night. On each picture I had a comment from my mom saying, "You're grounded." FML
Today, I briefly left my laptop while I went to use the toilet. When I came back, I found "I" had posted on Facebook, calling my mom a "stupid cunt who should just stay in the kitchen." The only other person home at the time was my grandpa. She didn't believe it, and permanently grounded me. FML
Today, I logged onto Facebook to a new notification. I got excited, until I went on to see that it was my mom commenting on my status. She had seen my friends swear in previous comments and decided to make a comment of her own. She told them, "Hey, watch out yr language!" I'm nineteen. FML
Today, my normally very modest and prissy mom came home, pissed off about something. I asked her what was wrong, but she wouldn't say, and snapped at me to "fuck off." She then grounded me for "making" her use that kind of "vile language." FML
Today, my dad grounded me for swearing, after I read a funny comment on Youtube to my sister. The supposed swear word? "YOLO." FML
Today, my mom left for a business trip. Thinking it was a good time to throw a party, I mass messaged everyone on my contact list. I thought it was going to be a success. The problem with this? My mom is on my contacts list. She replied "I'll be home in an hour. You're grounded." FML
Today, my mom made a Facebook status about me: "My daughter is on her rags and won't shut the fuck up #annoyingbitch". FML
Today, my mother is mad at me for deleting my Facebook account. I actually deleted the account because I'd had enough of putting up with her criticizing comments on every Facebook post I made. FML
Today, our house caught fire. While trying to help my mom get to safety, the word "fuck" accidentally escaped my mouth. Once we were safe, she said I was grounded for swearing. I'm 19. FML
Today, my mom took my cell to work with her. When she got home later, she scolded me for not answering her calls. When I pointed out that she'd taken it, she grounded me for "talking back". FML
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Top comments
nikkibeez 0
haha oh well.. that's why you shouldn't accept family members on fb if you dont want them to see certain things.
impatientkarma 0
That's what you get for saying things on the internet you won't normally say in front of your mom.
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Comments (197)
TheDamnDrifter 1
My dad added me but smart me only swears n the CHAT! he cant c dat!
blackwidowtaco 31
Hopefully, he can't see all the poor grammar errors you make while using chat, either.
KICKxASSxNINJA 3
You're a fool for adding your mother. That's why I never added family members on FB. Delete her.
ImApencil 0
why would you add her in the first place? and what are you, 12?
Alexisfbaby6 0
My mom is currently on my block list. When she searches me on facebook she says "I can't find you" lol I always say that's odd.
XBCX96 4
1. you can delete her post if you want, so YDI for being stupid in that sense. 2. YDI for accepting a request from YOUR MOM
alexaluvee 0
that sounds just like my mom. I'm so sorry for you OP :(
mad2physicist 0
The best technique is to make a second, fake facebook account to add relatives.
SuicidalxDream 0
my dad is a pervet and post wayyy worse stuff on my wall that's not right - grumbles- pervey lol
BadGirlShamara 0
omg my family stalk me on facebook too! isn't it the worst.
runbabyrun13 0
I tell my mom to get a facebook all the time her response is "why I can just stock people on your and your sisters facebook" exact words