Today, my husband let me sleep in while he worked on the landscaping by our backyard pool. Ready for a shower, I stripped naked, opened the back door to let the dog out, and stepped out to ask him how it was going. Turns out he'd finally hired a landscaping crew. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my husband, who rarely helps with big projects around the house, offered to help me with our mess of a backyard. An hour and a half into the project, and an hour and a half after he disappeared from the backyard, I found him mowing and edging the front. Our front yard was immaculate and didn't need mowed. FML
Today, I got super psyched up about a landscaping project my wife denied last year that she's finally game for, which will both fix a water leak into the house, and make our backyard look amazing. I took a week of PTO, then 20 minutes later my wife called to tell me a tree in our back yard fell over. We're also probably getting divorced. FML
Today, my husband was home past his usual departure time for work, so I pointedly asked if he would be late. He said he called out sick. I stared at him, wide-eyed in disbelief, as he said he "wanted to relax in the yard with a book." He's completely lost his mind. FML
Today, my husband thought it'd be funny to trigger the alarm in the house while I was sleeping. Shocked, I ran outside naked. FML
Today, I woke up and opened my curtains to see my gardener up a ladder in front of my window tending to the plants growing up the side of the wall. This would've been fine if his ballsack wasn't hanging out his shorts. FML
Today, I found out what my husband meant when he said he "accidentally installed an indoor pool" last night. FML
Today, when I got home from work, my fiancé was finishing up with the plumber who had just installed new fixtures for our shower. I decided that I was going to be the first to break it in. I went to the bathroom, got undressed and went to start the water. The OTHER plumber was still in there. FML
Today, my husband popped out to the hotel gym while I jumped in the shower. After a while I heard a knock on the door. Thinking it was him, I cheekily opened the door in my naked glory to be greeted by the maid. I didn’t know do-not-disturb signs aren’t double sided. FML
Today, I woke up early, showered, dressed, and made the 40 minute drive to work, only to discover when I arrived that today was my day off. When I got home my live in boyfriend was gone. I called and he told me he was at the beach, right near my work. FML
Today, after getting out of the shower, I was in a good mood. So I decided to run around the house naked, then play air guitar while air drying, just for fun. My blinds were open, and the men in the Fedex truck in my front yard did have fun. FML
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Top comments
life_is_life 0
you stepped outside naked? LOL. well, dont worry i bet they enjoyed it.
Yeoman 0
haha thats awesome. Im sure they loved that job, and theyll be back ANYTIME.
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Comments (148)
prettyxdemented 0
Why the **** would you step outside naked at ALL, even if you thought there was no one there? Common sense, please, common sense. YDI.
prettyxdemented 0
Also 27/83, you're the one who sounds like an insecure little prick. "Lololol I hook up with different girls, I go to a really smart school I'M BETTER THAN YOU ALL HAHAHAHA." Dude, nobody cares. If you really had a life you wouldn't have read through 56 more comments before coming back to defend your internet honor. Nobody cares. It's the internet. If people gang up on you... it... doesn't matter. A defensive post? Makes you look stupid. Amazing, I know.
theluckygirl28 8
haha agreed with 93 :) 27=dumb 42 yr old guy with 15 cats making up an internet story :) btw-- OP, you made me laugh :) I've done stuff like that cept not really... mainly having gardeners look through my window after i shower. but same kinda embarrassment... lol
Blue_Munki 0
feel that morning breeze baby! i'm sure the crew was thrilled if you're hot (or utterly disgusted if you're not) but anyway, you deserve it. gosh, u could at least put on a sexy robe....YDI
wallythedolly 0
lol someone repeat what 27 said before it was moderated!
kingez77 0
look before you leap
MeganBJ 0
in town.. no matter if you have a fence out back.. going out naked is an absolute no no..
rednaxela_fml 0
hahahaha!! that's hilarious!
Jakey_92 0
get bent. getting naked at your own house is fine. Get naked you prudes
Indiana_fml 4
This raises a question: Is there a positive counterpart to FML? A website where you tell others about your best moment of the day?