Today, my husband bought me a cinnamon roll because my blood sugar was dangerously low. My first bite was easily the most delicious thing I'd eaten since getting pregnant. As I sat in frosting coated ecstasy, my husband snatched up the rest of the pastry and finished it himself. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, as I'm 7 months pregnant and craving sweets, I helped myself to my MIL's birthday cake a little early. The family got so angry, they actually made me leave the party. My husband agreed with them. FML
Today, thanks to pregnancy hormones, I had the most vivid dream of eating a caramel apple mousse cake with vanilla bean ice cream. Unfortunately, yesterday, also thanks to pregnancy hormones, I was diagnosed with diabetes. My dreams are taunting me. FML
Today, I woke up early to bake cinnamon rolls for a party. I came home later to find the whole tray spilled onto the floor, most of the rolls eaten, and my dog sitting happily nearby. FML
Today, my boyfriend said he felt like eating icing. So I baked him cupcakes, put icing on them and decorated them. When I handed them to him, he picked off the decoration, licked the icing and handed the cupcake back to me, saying, "I told you that's all I wanted." FML
Today, my girlfriend and I had sex. Later, she said the highlight of her day was getting a cupcake from the grocery store. FML
Today, I found out that my wife is pregnant again. During her last two pregnancies, she craved pop-tarts and screamed bloody murder at the drop of a hat, so I went out and bought a box for her. Turns out that this time, pop-tarts make her want to puke. Cue screaming. FML
Today, my boyfriend bought my favorite doughnuts for our anniversary. After settling down and pouring a glass of wine, I grabbed a doughnut and quickly realized the filling inside wasn't jelly. He thought it would be funny to replace it with toothpaste. FML
Today, I ate some amazing homemade brownies that my best friend's wife made for us. She waited till I'd shoved a third one into my mouth before she mentioned she made them with breast milk. Knowing her, I don't even doubt it was true. FML
Today, while my boyfriend and I were having sex, he stopped, got off, walked into the kitchen grabbed a doughnut, and came back to finish while he ate it. FML
Today, I went to the doctor, only to find out I can no longer eat chocolate, my favorite food. When I got home, my boyfriend took the chocolate cake I'd been eating from the fridge, sat down in front of me, and ate the whole thing without breaking eye contact. FML
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Top comments
ciarafox9 9
My mouth was watering reading this..
Mirorbo 27
....Must I point out the obvious? Your husband is a dick...
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Comments (237)
exotica_fml 6
he should've bought 2 then
YourEvilHero 12
sounds really good. probably would've done the same
eminemchick 19
you have exceptional food describing skills
I_iz_B_a_troll 24
Should've eaten quicker :D
chiddy_bang71 0
Frosting coated ecstasy? Sounds kinky.
ashleylucky16 6
I love how you added an 'lol' after you raged. :)
ashleylucky16 6
Whoops ^ that reply went to the wrong comment.
captianKool 4
HE bought it and was nice enough to give you some..... I don't see the problem
zbajis 7
I guess chivalry is dead after all.....
chocol8m 6
Haha ((: u can only eat so fast when ur having a food orgasim (:
StoryOfTheYear 15
Duh-uh It's a recession!
theaws0m3guy 4
Hide yo' pastries!
ljbgamer 1
76 :D I love your picture
enopola 5
She should have gotten her ass up and got one, hell he was nice enough to give her a bite, he never said anything about the whole thing.
z3vil 11
OP says clearly that it was bought for HER cause of her low blood sugar, not him and she just got a bite
astarwarsfan 0
Cinnamonroll'd?!?
5t3ff1k4h 47
172 - Her blood sugar was DANGEROUSLY low. I doubt she'd have the energy or time before she inevitably fainted to go get her own. **** you and your idiocy.
MissMisc3 7
Ha! XD I love that comment.
ciarafox9 9
My mouth was watering reading this..
Lanceeden 12
Make one yourself. You're a girl. duhhhh
genesisnirvana 11
29-I really hope you're being sarcastic.
sxe_beast 11
Mine as well. Heading to the store to buy some cinnamon rolls... RIGHT NAO!
MrSexyPants 14
I just found cinnamon rolls in my refrigerator and I can't believe I got so lucky. I have to eat them now. It's an unspoken fml rule.
ScaughtieHolden 11
2 has a pregnancy fetish
StoryOfTheYear 15
Most females do, it seems like
snuffypeacee 0
mine too!
j_cat187 20
Omg that reminded me about the cinibuns in the fridge to bad I'm too lazy to cook or spell correctly
sxe_beast 11
I ate me some cinnamon rollllllllllllllllz XD!
alliewillie 22
As rude as that was, your life is hardly screwed. Go get another one.
AlexRen 21
cinnamon rolls are delicious.
skyeyez9 25
Cinammon rolls baking in your oven...OMG. The delicious aroma fills your entire house!
eurekaroy 6
I'm allergic to cinnamon :(
eurekaroy 6
I'm allergic to cinnamon :(
Newboyz00185 0
On the other hand, fat rolls are atrocious
theaws0m3guy 4
Damn right they are!
AlexRen 21
Awh poo
jigsawbanana 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
YUMMY I'd so the same thing cinnamon rolls are dang delish.
SugarCrazy 14
You'd rip a cinnamon roll out of your spouse's hand when their blood sugar is dangerously low...? Damn, I feel sorry for whoever marries you.
wishfulmidget 0
nobody likes your pic. thats why the thumbs down. take the hint. try having an awesomer pic like mine
CryMoreFMLs 15
Your pic scares the shit out of me, I don't find that epic....
gamerhead 3
57- ha! Ur name reference
hayleybailey888 0
actually I like your picture and it's probably what I would have done. but afterward I would throw a packet of fruit gushers at her.
jigsawbanana 0
Sorry y'all take a joke? I would never really do that..cinnamon rolls are yummy.
sulitak 27
then you buy two. you don't take it from your wife with dangerously low blood sugar. ESPECIALLY a pregnant wife. that kind of shit can effect your future child. Her health needs to come first when pregnant. Now, I can see my DH stealing HALF if I wasn't preggers... so if you aren't lying about joking and/or missed the pregnant part I can kinda see how you thought the joke would be funny. But still, health problems should still trump your liking a food
Mirorbo 27
....Must I point out the obvious? Your husband is a dick...
eminemchick 19
maybe a ****** too:D
mynameis1339 0
No because anyone that's decent knows that's a dick move
Soloman212 28
Don't be so harsh! It's a cinnamon roll! They're irresistible!
404wan 19
The point is that he got it for her because her bloodsugar was dangerously low. Giving her one bite and then just grabbing and eating the rest? Thats ****** up.
ashleylucky16 6
Or maybe he wanted to be in frosted ecstasy along with his wife... it's a mutual experience.
elmogoezRAWR 0
They could have a foodgasm at the same time.
Pinguini26 6
amen
ashleylucky16 6
#55 exactly :)
cherry72 13
Sounds likes ops hubby and mine are twins! Mine would do something selfish like that too! Wish I knew before the "I Do's"
Lenho 26
#55 Not if he takes the bigger part. Mmh... that somehow resembles the reality :(
buckeye08 10
55 - you mean an oralgasm? (:
MyPupRox 2
holy crap! its a cinnamon roll! i dont see how that could of actually ruined your day or ****** your life, unless you're really fat...
Katy326 10
What a butt!
mk58 31
Oh my god, your profile picture is ******* scary. And I'm one to talk.
eminemchick 19
na 41 u seem like my kinda guy;)
elmogoezRAWR 0
What what, in the butt.
Lanceeden 12
Wanna do it in ma butt, in ma butt?
MrTittySprinkles 7
75- Take the seat off your bike and do it your self.
ThEKID96 4
Where did you get that shirt? I want to buy that epic thing for my gf now.
Iheartfunny 1
I love the way OP described it.Because I once sat in frosting coated extasy. But not the same way she did .Brings back alot of memories... warm sticky memories *sigh*
omgthatsosuppera 4
gasp! shame on him
Lovesglee 3
Those r yummy, I cant belive that S.O.B. took it! :(
luvppl 6
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
He's saving you from yourself!!! Don't do it!!! Being skinny is so much more important than your blood sugar!!! (Sarcasm)
redbluegreen 41
What?
leearm104 4
What do you not understand about this? Because it's hard to make this much simpler.
AnagenisisZagus 13
I believe it is not as much an issue of understanding as it is an issue of relevance...
lekiat 0
Will he take your boob out your future baby's mouth and feed himself instead?
MrTittySprinkles 7
Well if he dosn't I will.