Today, I woke up early to bake cinnamon rolls for a party. I came home later to find the whole tray spilled onto the floor, most of the rolls eaten, and my dog sitting happily nearby. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I tried my hand at baking homemade individual apple tarts. While taking them out of the oven, I dropped the entire tray on the floor. My dog acted like it was Christmas in August and scarfed at least half of them. FML
Today, I spent hours baking a multi-layered, detailed cake from scratch for my mom's birthday. It took two seconds for my dog to devour the cake while I picked up a spoon I dropped on the floor. FML
Today, I came home to find my dog had learned how to open our fridge. He ate the birthday cake I was saving for a friend's surprise party, and to add insult to injury, he'd also apparently thrown the barely digested cake up all over my bed. FML
Today, I went home for lunch. Upon opening the door, I smelled something horrid. My dog had opened his cage, eaten all the dog treats, and had diarrhea all over my bed and bedroom floor. FML
Today, I came home to find the dog had learned how to open our stair-gate and kitchen door, devoured the entire fruitcake I'd made for a special occasion, and then vomited said fruitcake all over the fabric sofa. FML
Today, I was trying out a new pizza recipe that I saw online. I made the dough, spread the sauce, and added my toppings. As I was about to put it in the oven, I realized I'd forgotten to preheat it. No big deal, or so I thought. I then knocked the entire fucking uncooked pizza face-first onto the kitchen floor. The dog ate better than I did tonight. FML
Today, I'd finally got home from a 15-hour shift at work and wanted to lay down and eat. I poured myself a bowl of cereal, went to my room, and sat it on my bed. My dog then jumped right on my bed and yanked the sheets off, causing the cereal to fly everywhere. FML
Today, I tripped over my dog while carrying groceries. As I laid on the floor surrounded by smashed eggs, spilled milk, and a bruised knee, my dog stole the bread from the bag and and ran off. FML
Today, I helped myself to some homemade biscuits that had been left in the kitchen. I thought they looked a little odd, but they tasted pretty good. I found out later they were homemade dog treats. FML
Today, after working an 11 hour shift, I decided to treat myself to a delicious Krispy Kreme doughnut. When I got home, I sat down, put my feet up, poured myself a cold glass of milk. My dog jumped on my lap and vomited all over my doughnuts, stared at me, then bit the doughnut out of my hand. FML
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Top comments
KhaleesiDannie 26
Well at least someone was happy
LilMissCanadian 22
FYL, that must have been awful to see. YDI to your dog when he gets fat.
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Comments (57)
KhaleesiDannie 26
Well at least someone was happy
Livin_Like_Larry 29
Hope your dog doesn't get sick :/
LilMissCanadian 22
FYL, that must have been awful to see. YDI to your dog when he gets fat.
stingray112 24
Hey you're enough party for a group you don't need cinnamon rolls
Lalala579121 28
The dog is, certainly.
geekpower_fml 28
Make sure you keep them well out of reach or inside the fridge next time. Really unhealthy for the poor dog!
Pop_And_Lock 14
Now you know that they tasted good.
thefaekitten 29
Dogs drink out of the toilet, so i dont think thats a very good point.
TripleDallas123 15
Dogs drink out of toilets because of water. I've never seen a dog drink out of any toilet with #1/#2 in it.
JayGatsby 25
Well my dog licks the ground, so I mean yeah, they eat whatever.
jazzybaby179 22
Darn dogs! I've had food taken from my plate when I'm not looking for a minute.. Grr
andrmac 25
You have pets you need to take precautions... We had a cat that if you left brownies to cool she would climb up and take a nap on them but was only a 1 time thing since we put them out of her reach after that.
rinzlerkitty94 31
Your cat sounds incredible.
smokecloud_ 37
That mental image is adorable. And I agree with the rest of the commenters. My dog won't touch anything if I'm here, but when I leave I have to put up the cats' food bowl, put a chair in front of the closet door where his food is, and make sure that anything that does or at one point had food in it is out of reach. Ask my lo mein I forgot to put away yesterday...
JamesILoveFML 11
Atleast your cat didn't eat them if that's a plus.
pjsr 33
GREAT PARTY!!! (for the dog)
HeartYou101 31
I'd be careful of that! Cinnamon is really bad for dogs!
Maegraithe 3
Actually, cinnamon is non-toxic to dogs. The ASPCA website is a great resource for checking toxicity do foods, plants, etc.
JayGatsby 25
I think you're thinking of nutmeg :)