Today, my husband asked me to show him my boob. I began to pull the side of my shirt down when he said, "No, not that one, the big one." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I started doing a striptease for my husband. He asked me to stop. FML
Today, while babysitting a six year-old boy, he asked me if I could show him my "boobies." I said no, that wouldn't be very appropriate. Suddenly, he pulled down his undies and pointed at his package while exclaiming, "Look, my penis is on again!" It was pointing RIGHT at me. FML
Today, my dad came to confiscate my phone. I stuck it in between my boobs so he wouldn't be able to see it. He said, "Honey, your breasts aren't big enough to hide that." FML
Today, my boyfriend saw my boobs for the first time. His reaction was, "Well that's... disappointing". FML
Today, my boyfriend started talking to my breasts in public. As if that wasn't bad enough, he then started to jiggle them in his hands. FML
Today, I was getting ready to have sex with my boyfriend for the first time. It seems he thought I was a much larger cup size than I really am, because when he saw my actual boobs, he said, "Aaaaaaand they're gone". FML
Today, after ten minutes of squishing my boobs together for my boyfriend, trying to get him to stare, he glanced at them then blankly said "I've seen better tits on my mom, so baby just stop that" and smiled. FML
Today, I found out my boyfriend had bought me sexy lingerie for our anniversary. However, they're for for a bigger bust. When I asked if I could return it for the right size, he asked me to get a boob job to fit the bra instead. FML
Today, I went out to a store. I didn't have a bra on under my shirt, but some stranger offered to buy me one, because she didn't like the fact that my nipples were hard, and her husband was able to see them. FML
Today, while having sex, my boyfriend admitted to having an affair. To comfort me, he said, "But you have bigger boobs, so you have nothing to worry about." FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
SusanBieber 10
Don't worry, almost every girl's boobs are not identical. It's natural
astralvagan 20
You should ask him to show you his penis and then say the same thing to him
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (122)
JubileeBee 31
I found it hilarious that he just randomly asked to see a single boob, lol.
ArmlessSkydiver 7
If it were only that easy..
bigdfootball97 24
As long as he thinks one of them is big...
VirtueSong 3
Biggie Smalls
jarrettd 27
This is the Mommy one and this is the daughter one and they hold hands and are friends
monthescots 7
Don't worry about it, all men have a favourite
OmerSuper 10
strange BoOBs...
alialley 10
Blame him for massaging his favorite boob, thereby enlarging it.
Malea_the_wise 8
My left boob is larger than my fight boob
theFickleFinger 24
Whoa! I'm almost afraid to ask but what's a fight boob?
Tyrax 16
So then you guided him to a mirror, and showed him his reflection, saying, "You're the biggest boob."