Today, my horse farted and scared itself, then ran all the way up the hill and wouldn't stop until I fell off. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was riding my newly trained horse. I've recently been suffering from bad gas, and ended up farting so violently, it spooked my horse into bucking me off and running away. FML
Today, not only did my horse step on my foot & refuse to move, he also took the opportunity to crap on my other foot while I was incapable of moving. FML
Today, I was riding a new horse when a lawnmower starting up spooked her. She jumped straight up in the air and I landed directly on the saddle horn. I can't walk or feel anything between my legs. FML
Today, while letting horses out to switch pasture, one ran at me, sending me through the electric fence and into a mud puddle. Wrapped in electric fence, I sat in that electric mud puddle, screaming every time it shocked me. Help arrived, once they'd had a good long laugh. FML
Today, my dog farted so loud in his sleep that he scared himself and woke up barking. This afternoon I achieved the same feat. FML
Today, I was putting my horse away into her pasture, when I slipped in the mud. In a haisty attempt to support myself, I grabbed the electric fence in on hand, and my horse with the other. The shock from the fence traveled through me to her, sending her running and leaving me with 2 broken teeth. FML
Today, I was at a rodeo warming up while my mom unnecessarily bragged about my training skills to a client. My horse then threw me into a gate at a full gallop, in front of everyone. That was the first time he'd ever misbehaved. FML
Today, I saw the girl that I've had a crush on forever riding her horse on the side of the road. She waved, and without thinking, I honked my horn in response. Her horse bucked her off. FML
Today, I was woken up by my own fart. FML
Today, thinking he was being so hilarious, my friend slipped me enough laxatives to make a horse shit its intestines out. I haven't been able to move from the toilet for over an hour. FML
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Top comments
Soloman212 28
Maybe he was just actually a very polite horse and was trying to carry you as far away from the smell as possible.
Ritchie1 7
I guess you could call it A night-mare
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Comments (82)
cottoncandymango 17
Your horse seems adorable and considerate to kind its manners.
cottoncandymango 17
*mind Damn, autocorrect.
buddy51 23
What a gas! My nagging suspicion is that ole gasbag was feeling neighative because she was horsing around with jet assisted hill climbing and her fart marely failed to ignite, withering her flight plans. Manely OP she was pissed at having to hoof it instead of imitating her hero, Pegasus, and rocketing up the trail.
Stephy94 9
Overkill.
buddy51 23
That's what he said as he fell off his horse......
RoboCunnilingus 23
He probably said, "Ouch".
LarissaAllen 10
Staph.
Soloman212 28
Infection?
Lisee92 18
L
swordidfate 13
Hey, one horse bit mine in the ass and it took off like a shot
melikens 16
My horse did a similar thing once. Farted while she was scratching her ear and went galloping off frightened.
suri23 11
Amazing how animals are surprised by their flatulence, lol! My dog looks at its butt every she lets one rip.
crazytwinsmom 25
Mine too!
skyeyez9 25
Why are horses spooked by their own farts?! Don't they feel it come out of their butt and realize it theirs? My Australian cattle dog would fart, then casually walk out of the room, leaving you with the rancid gas hanging in the air.
skyeyez9 25
The first horse I ever sat on was a neighbor's elderly mare named Rosie. We rode her all over our property without a saddle, and she was so laid back and calm. Rosie farted ALOT, but they didn't bother her.
jw90 18
Lol that's hilarious.
worldclassrager 41
Hope you didn't hurt yourself too badly...