Today, my grandma told me point-blank that she despises gays, but that she'll go to my wedding for the booze and nothing more. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my friend, who is gay, announced that he's getting married. I implored him to not invite my parents and (especially) my grandma, for reasons that I'm sure you can figure out, but he did anyway. Long story short, he's inconsolable. What excellent parents I have. FML
Today, at my wedding reception, I jokingly asked my aunt, who has always been convinced that I am gay despite my protests, if she believed me now. She took this the wrong way and drunkenly went around telling my guests that my wedding was a sham to convince her I was straight. FML
Today, it was my wedding day. Midway through the ceremony, my grandma, who's tried to ruin every relationship to date, stood up and shouted that "it ain't right", "you're too good for her", and claimed my fiancée has been cheating on me, before she was finally ejected from the building. FML
Today, I called my grandmother to wish her a happy Valentine's Day. She asked me if I had a date lined up. I didn't, and before I could explain why, she responded with, "Well, maybe all the other gays went on vacation!" Thanks Grandma, I'm not gay. FML
Today, my grandmother tried to start a fist-fight with my wife during my wedding ceremony. FML
Today, I married the man of my dreams. At the after-party, my psycho grandma stood up, called for quiet, and engaged in a long rant about how this was "the beginning of the end" and advising everyone that the secret to a successful marriage is "cheating, plain and simple". FML
Today, my grandmother called me to tell me that there will be a nice, single guy for me to meet at the family reunion. She went on and on about how perfect he was for me. I didn't have the heart to tell her I'm a lesbian, and have been out to the rest of the family for over six years. FML
Today, my step-sister told me that she was getting married to her girlfriend next summer. At a big family brunch, I made a toast to their marriage. I didn't know that my step-mom didn't know they were dating in the first place, or that she was severely homophobic. FML
Today, my grandmother informed me that I was rude to her at my wedding two months ago, all because she couldn’t sit at the bridal table, even though she "paid for the wedding." FML
Today, during a family reunion, my 89 year-old grandma stood up and drunkenly made a speech about how ashamed I should be of myself for still being single. She then passed out at the table. Half my family got up to help her, the other half whispered in agreement. FML
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Top comments
Tarlachia 33
"I despise alcoholics, but I'll still take what I want from your estate when you die."
RjSwegMaster 7
Tell her not to come
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Comments (143)
jtitus46 1
Have you tried not being gay? Just a thought....
jtitus46 1
Good thing I live in Indiana!!:)
nrubs11 9
Some people are just old fashioned and closed minded. I don't agree with her even in the slightest, however, it's probably just the lifestyle she grew up with. It's not an excuse but…
beyondflight 16
Lol
Paws_Cat 29
Don't have booze at the wedding and don't let her leave.
awesomeaiden 5
Don't worry these values will finally die when bill O'Reilly and the his elderly army incinerate in the hypothetical flames of hell
Calacor 17
Hard to be gay :p my granny is completely fine with it, but mom... jesus some people are just.mean
TallMist 32
I totally agree with you. Some people really need to check their attitude.
savemeSheehan 8
Uninvited I hope
meganmax 14
let her get her drink on somewhere else ?
toyhenoctus 16
Wow...I guess not all Canadians are nice. The stereotype has been disproven...
DreamerIsAwake 11
As an Albertan I can honestly say that compared to the rest of the country, Alberta is full of assholes.