Today, my grandma told me point-blank that she despises gays, but that she'll go to my wedding for the booze and nothing more. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my friend, who is gay, announced that he's getting married. I implored him to not invite my parents and (especially) my grandma, for reasons that I'm sure you can figure out, but he did anyway. Long story short, he's inconsolable. What excellent parents I have. FML
Today, at my wedding reception, I jokingly asked my aunt, who has always been convinced that I am gay despite my protests, if she believed me now. She took this the wrong way and drunkenly went around telling my guests that my wedding was a sham to convince her I was straight. FML
Today, it was my wedding day. Midway through the ceremony, my grandma, who's tried to ruin every relationship to date, stood up and shouted that "it ain't right", "you're too good for her", and claimed my fiancée has been cheating on me, before she was finally ejected from the building. FML
Today, I called my grandmother to wish her a happy Valentine's Day. She asked me if I had a date lined up. I didn't, and before I could explain why, she responded with, "Well, maybe all the other gays went on vacation!" Thanks Grandma, I'm not gay. FML
Today, my grandmother tried to start a fist-fight with my wife during my wedding ceremony. FML
Today, I married the man of my dreams. At the after-party, my psycho grandma stood up, called for quiet, and engaged in a long rant about how this was "the beginning of the end" and advising everyone that the secret to a successful marriage is "cheating, plain and simple". FML
Today, my grandmother called me to tell me that there will be a nice, single guy for me to meet at the family reunion. She went on and on about how perfect he was for me. I didn't have the heart to tell her I'm a lesbian, and have been out to the rest of the family for over six years. FML
Today, my step-sister told me that she was getting married to her girlfriend next summer. At a big family brunch, I made a toast to their marriage. I didn't know that my step-mom didn't know they were dating in the first place, or that she was severely homophobic. FML
Today, my grandmother informed me that I was rude to her at my wedding two months ago, all because she couldn’t sit at the bridal table, even though she "paid for the wedding." FML
Today, during a family reunion, my 89 year-old grandma stood up and drunkenly made a speech about how ashamed I should be of myself for still being single. She then passed out at the table. Half my family got up to help her, the other half whispered in agreement. FML
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Top comments
Tarlachia 33
"I despise alcoholics, but I'll still take what I want from your estate when you die."
RjSwegMaster 7
Tell her not to come
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Comments (143)
CLT_420 13
Lol I'd be happy she didn't smack you with holy water and say "gay begone" cuz that's what I would have got if I was a homosexual
Manic1 13
I would tell her that her intolerant old ass isn't invited. The wedding is for people who SUPPPORT the couple and want to see them commit their lives to each other.
Sheepalicious 20
OP That sucks. While she is entitled to her opinion about her views on gays, this is completely disrespectful. FYL
Badkarma4u 17
When an old person shares their intolerance, I simply respond with, what do you care, youll be dead soon.
labaro19 17
Congratulations!!
thatsme293 28
Give her O'Doules.
acrochick27 15
Say "I despise drunks, but I'll still take ur estate...oh Btw u aren't and never were officially invited. Buh-bye"
876t786t6oi 12
Haaaaaa gaayyyyyyy!
TallMist 32
Yes, yes he is. So what?
kavyashahs 16
Grandma's nowdays
snarkytruth 37
At least she is still talking to you and willing to go. Maybe over time she will change her mind once she gets to know if your spouse. Then she'll be glad she went to the wedding for other reasons.