Today, my girlfriend whom I'm crazy about broke up with me out of the blue. After pleading with her unsuccessfully, I called my mom for comfort and advice. She informed me that my dog had died. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I texted my girlfriend to tell her that we couldn't hang out because my dog died this morning and we were burying him. She replied that she wasn't going to get stood up by a stupid dog. She then broke up with me. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because her mom said she would buy her a pug if she did. I got dumped for a dog, and an ugly one for that matter. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because she heard me say "love you" on the phone. I was talking to my mom. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Her mom who had passed away years ago told her that I was cheating on her, telepathically. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. She told me that her father didn't approve of me and forced her out of the relationship. Her father died 2 years ago. FML
Today, my girlfriend dumped me because her dog "told her to". FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me, because apparently my mom hates him and doesn't want us to be together. My mom died six years ago. FML
Today, my girlfriend dumped me because I didn't attend her dog's funeral, and was therefore an insensitive bastard. I couldn't attend because my mum has cancer and I was driving her to a hospital appointment. FML
Today, I was playing with my dog, teasing her, to cheer myself up after being dumped by my girlfriend. My dog bit me hard and I had to go to hospital. The dog has to be put down. FML
Today, my boyfriend dumped me. I tried to hide my sadness from my mom. She still noticed, and tried to cheer me up. She took me to a funeral. FML
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Top comments
AntDog27 0
Dude I feel for you. About the girl and the dog, I have a soft spot for animals, but dont worry kerp ur head up the night is always darkest before the dawn
DocBastard 40
I agree. He certainly sounds very melancollie, like he stepped in a big mud poodle. Whatever you do, don't collar. She'll probably terrier heart out all over again. And don't go chasing after her trying to retriever; you'd only look more pathetic. I would suggest a little trip to get over her - maybe to Labrador. You can use my travel agent, Jack Russell. He's a boxer on the side, but he's excellent.
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Comments (100)
legend831 6
wow a double theart, well get a girl dats into u 2
DBCPon 0
im sorry bro, i know how you feel, same thing happened to me cept it was dog and se broke up wit me when i told her
sweet_princess 0
Awww
MissBoo111 21
look **** off I cryer my heart out when my dog died and I my boyfriend broke up with me
antonio21 0
who the hell cares about your dog that is no fml
kay729 7
Talk about kicking you when your down
DecembersShadow 2
I'm sorry OP, that sucks :/ FYL
imhope 23
FYL
zachthegaut 10
This reminds me of my birthday