Today, my girlfriend guilted me into roleplaying as Justin Bieber before and during sex. I now feel physically ill. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my girlfriend wanted to role-play non-consensual sex. I was already uncomfortable with the idea, and when she started begging, "No, no" as I stripped her, I dropped the role-play and walked out. Now she's pissed at me. I'm sorry, but this is fucking creepy. FML
Today, my girlfriend wanted to roleplay as a schoolgirl. I was excited, until we started and she asked me to lick her "vajayjay". I cringed so hard, my skull practically caved in. I broke down laughing while trying to explain my cringing. Now she's pissed and I'm blue-balled. FML
Today, I had a dream where I was giving Justin Bieber a blowjob. I'm a totally straight male. I have half a mind to bill the little bastard for therapy sessions. FML
Today, I was trying to be dirty with my fiancé. He got really into the roleplaying and wouldn't stop pretending to be a cop for hours. Mood officially killed. FML
Today, my girlfriend admitted she had a nightmare about having sex with me. FML
Today, my girlfriend convinced me to do some bedroom roleplay, and we decided on acting out a job interview scenario. I suggestively told her that if she wanted to get the job, she'd have to use her mouth on something else first. She called me a pig and ended the roleplay right there. FML
Today, my girlfriend was giving me a hand job when she started crying. Despite my pleas for her to stop and attempts to comfort her, she insisted that she continue. I feel like a monster. FML
Today, my wife and I decided to try out role playing. She ended up having an anxiety attack when I said she wasn't turning in her homework. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were going to get intimate, so I masturbated before leaving my place, hoping it would help me last longer than usual. 10 minutes in, she shoved me off and started screaming at me, convinced that I've been cheating on her and practising with someone else. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting pretty hot and heavy, then he said, "Let's pretend you're someone else." FML
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Top comments
Welshite 40
Did you scream "baby, baby, baby, ooh..."?
cmayer 20
I am so very sorry for your misfortune.
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Comments (250)
worldclassrager 41
Don't whine he does that enough...
Cazz91 21
What in the hairy **** is wrong with your girlfriend and you for caving in to her ****** up fetish? She honestly couldn't pick something better like Johnny Depp as Captain Jack Sparrow? Of all things to roleplay as....*shudders*
keepingitnasty 15
Damn, I'm into some freaky shit, but that's out there to me. How can you look her in the eyes afterwards?
asssh18 6
Get rid of her right now!
laurenlovesjb 20
Sorry guys, I really don't like to argue haha. So Im not gonna have much more to say today:) I respect your opinions.
Ziggy122 15
Did she make you spit in her face while wearing drop-crotch pants? But seriously, I've heard of some odd fetishes and fantasies, but... Ew. I don't get how anyone over the age of 12 is attracted to that kid.
spartanMKIV 9
run, bro
Schizomaniac 24
This thread is more retarded than my religious trolling.
Aero_x 21
She must be one hell of a girl to be worth that!! On a more optimistic point of view, you basically role-played as lesbians :D
MerrikBarbarian 9
Nah, that is an insult to lesbians :p
Nordrag 26
I had this same argument with laurenlovesjb a while back. I think I got thumbed down though because I started the argument. But honestly, the bashing on jb is a bit much. His music isn't any worse than the other "popular" music out there, and he's not much more of a douche bag than some celebrities. I just feel that to idolize him the way that so many do is completely insane.