Today, my girlfriend dumped me for no real reason via text message. A few hours later, she updated her relationship status on Facebook to "in a relationship." Her new "boyfriend"? Her cat. A mutual friend commented, "Well, he's better than that idiot you had before." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my girlfriend of 3 months broke up with me via text and said she was keeping the cat. I've had the cat since for seven years since she was a kitten. FML
Today, my boyfriend dumped me. According to his Facebook, he had a new girlfriend 16 seconds later. FML
Today, my girlfriend dumped me because her dog "told her to". FML
Today, my girlfriend had someone else dump me via text message. I knew it wasn't her because for once I wasn't being viciously insulted, and it wasn't written as if an illiterate baboon had taken a shit all over her keypad. I can't even feel happy about being rid of her. FML
Today, my girlfriend left me for my best friend. Over a text message with "lol" in it. FML
Today, I rang my girlfriend to make sure she made it home alright. She told me to check my Facebook. Nothing was different so I hit refresh. We were no longer in a relationship. I got dumped via Facebook whilst on the phone to her. FML
Today, my fiancée broke up with me over text message while I was away for work. She later posted photos of her and her new boyfriend on Facebook, while still wearing my engagement ring. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. She later put on Facebook that, "Today was a great day!" FML
Today, I had the displeasure of watching my boyfriend’s Facebook go from “In a relationship” with me to “Single”, then switched to a big “In a relationship with” the girl he told me was “just a friend” post, after ending our 5-year relationship over text message. FML
Today, I bought my girlfriend a cat. I now have a cat and no girlfriend. FML
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Top comments
vballgirly28 16
That's just weird. Seriously a cat? What can you do with a cat....never mind I don't want to know.
helpfulwhale 12
She really let the cat out of the bag on that one, didn't she?
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Comments (113)
phoneYuNOlisten 16
She was never worth it then. Maybe the mutual friend said that as a joke?
jamnglamgirlie 17
Be happy you dodged a potential crazy cat lady.
thatpurpleone 12
Let's see her cat give her an ******.
klovemachine 24
Let's not :O
jamnglamgirlie 17
Wait so her cat's on Facebook?
cuddlyunicorn 17
Well you should date a dog and be like, "you're better than that bitch I had before"
davincidasecond 24
I guess it's her way of saying that she prefers pussy.
incoherentrmblr 22
You're better off with someone more sane.
JACKxRAWR 22
Erm, maybe you should think things through?
thehuntress309 12
Now would be a good time to run
buddy51 23
And, OP, the problem is? You're feline bad because she's found a new pussy?