Today, my girlfriend did the walk of shame in a skimpy Halloween costume after a night of drunken sex. Problem? The walk ended at my doorstep, and the sex was with a stranger. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I'm at odds with my fiancée because a drunk girl approached me at a Halloween party and complimented my costume. I barely acknowledged the woman and made polite small talk until she walked away. Apparently, I was too friendly and should have shooed the woman away rudely and immediately. FML
Today, my girlfriend informed me that during the night, I shot up in bed and whimpered tearfully, "I don't have anything for the fancy-dress!" She also decided to share this with all our friends. I'm never going to live this down. FML
Today, some filthy creep grabbed my girlfriend's ass in front of me. I smashed his face in, as would be expected. Afterwards, we had wild sex, then she cried, told me how frightened my "unprovoked violent response" made her, and kicked me out. I'm now in a seedy motel, wondering what the hell happened. FML
Today, we had a great night out with my girlfriend and even won a costume contest together. I guess I wasn't the only one who had a great night, because when I got home I found that someone had robbed my apartment. FML
Today, I woke up after a night out partying only to find I'd wet the bed. I was so ashamed that I rolled my girlfriend into it to avoid taking the blame. FML
Today, I brought a girl home from the bar. After sleeping together, she drunkenly stumbles to the bathroom to wash up. On her way back, she accidentally walks into my parents' room, turns on the lights and asks where her clothes are before figuring it out. FML
Today, I went to a haunted house with the girl I like, thinking that she would get scared and turn to me for comfort. I ended up running out, and was put on the Wall of Shame. FML
Today, I tried to have a fun night out. I met a guy and we went back to "his" place, which turned out to actually be his mother's house. He introduced me to her. Two hours later, I knew his life story and had to do the walk of shame without ever getting anywhere near his bedroom. FML
Today, after spending a great evening with the guy I really like, he dropped me off outside my house. When he pulled into my driveway, his lights shone onto my drunken mum taking the garbage out in nothing but her black panties. FML
Today, I was busily having fun with my girlfriend, when suddenly the bedroom door opened and a man walked in, picked me up, and threw me outside the apartment. I was naked and didn't even know she was into men, much less had a husband. FML
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Top comments
Nightwing98 22
What was her costume? Trampire?
welsea28 6
She probably felt guilty...either way sorry OP
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Comments (217)
onorexveritas 24
what's the saying? "halloween is just an excuse for girls to act like ******" dump her cheating ass
janexxdoe 7
That does suck, but at least she came to you instea of trying to hide it, she obviously felt bad.
jordan271234 2
Just gonna say this was a problem before you even asked if it was a problem.
egrudy 9
Ouch! Just curious, why did she come to your door? Asking forgiveness? If so immediately confessing and showing remorse is honesty hard core. She could of pretended it never happened .
culito_fml 10
Maybe she got tired of walking and needed a ride home or somewhere to crash, or her drunk as wasn't thinking.. Either way, that's intense
threecardmonty 2
We live together. When I bought a house, I asked her to be my fiancee and move in with me.
2RaRa25 6
Hope you left the trash outside, OP. You can do better.
theburninator 1
Did you slam the door in her face like you should have?
rebanne 5
Dump her sorry cheating ass.
j_cat187 20
****, go ahead pull your drawers down at a time like this who needs applause now.
FMLGriff 8
I hope you meant "now ex girlfriend." I'm sorry thus happened to you. you probably should have been there since age was doing the slutty outfit, but that never excusing cheating.
BananerzFresh 12
Seems like it may be time for a new girlfriend...