Today, I'm at home, sick with walking pneumonia and a raging UTI. Every time I cough, I piss myself. I'm now having to lie on a bath towel and garbage bags until the meds kick in. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I'm recovering from a urinary tract infection. The infection made me have to pee constantly. Now the antibiotics I'm taking for it are giving me the shits instead. FML
Today, I was diagnosed with a kidney infection; the symptoms include nausea and having to pee every five minutes. I had to walk six miles in the pouring rain to pick up the medication, peed in the woods twice, got honked at while throwing up on the road, and my boyfriend told me not to complain. FML
Today, the bladder infection I thought I was over flared up at work, causing me to piss myself, despite having gone twice in the previous hour. I still had to finish my shift, soaked pants and all. FML
Today, after breaking my leg, I'm unable to put any weight on it whatsoever. Our bedroom? Upstairs. Our only bathroom? Basement. My husband thought it would be a great idea to leave me alone and unable to walk to go babysit his nieces. I had to piss in a bucket. FML
Today, I found out I have a yeast infection, a bladder infection, and a urinary tract infection all at the same time. Oh, and I also have the flu. FML
Today, I'm sick with a stomach flu. For the last 5 hours, I've been going back and forth from the couch to the bathroom. Each time I get into the bathroom, I have to make a choice of whether to sit on the toilet or kneel by it. Each time I have to clean up the other mess. FML
Today, I got home from work, took a shower, got ready for bed, and laid down right in cat piss. Now I'm shampooing the mattress and taking another shower just to sleep on the couch. FML
Today, I went to the doctor to see why my walking pneumonia wasn't getting any better. It had. I've just somehow managed to also contract mono... while sitting home, alone. FML
Today, I'm banned from the only working bathroom in my house because my mother is cleansing for an upcoming colonoscopy. My options are either a bucket in the basement, or wetting myself. FML
Today, I started antibiotics for a UTI. Now, along with a burning sensation whenever I pee, I also need to try not to fall asleep, put up with the headaches, nausea, and lightheadedness from the tablets, all while working two jobs and being a parent. Six days to go. FML
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Top comments
LovesSushi 25
Wait, you're not supposed to pee when you cough?
kut17 11
Wow. You must be in a pissy mood.
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Comments (66)
Musicholic_asey 1
Wow, that sucks. I hope you get better soon, OP!
daisy2101 7
Yeah, I'd be so pissed if that was me.
onlychildFTW 34
OP needs a diaper.
TotallyAradical 14
A diaper might not be a bad idea.
onlychildFTW 34
It's 100x better then towels and garbage bags. This is what they're made for.
LovesSushi 25
Wait, you're not supposed to pee when you cough?
nikkinurse 10
I'm a nurse and the pressure from an intense cough could make someone pee-
daisy2101 7
Not unless you have a daily kegel exercise routine
ryrock310 10
They have a urinary tract infection. That's why they are peeing.....
Goldenchest 14
Is it even possible to piss that much..?
TotallyAradical 14
UTIs don't make you pee large amounts. Just more often and very painfully.
JayJay925 6
Why not just lay/stand in your bath or shower.
01sparkly 15
It's probably uncomfortable
KM96 24
It's cold ... And it would be hours long
AKGirlinSD 20
3, OP is so sick that he/she is on bed rest. He/she wouldn't last too long in a shower. His/her energy is so low, their body feels like it got the crap kicked out of it.
Evanito007 13
I dont know what these other replies are thinking, thats a great idea, Jay!
Demonfish 14
Get well soon OP!
kut17 11
Wow. You must be in a pissy mood.
FaguIous 22
Urine a lot of trouble as I can see
hatesfate 6
Walking pneumonia?
at0micmin3r 23
Yup! There IS such a thing.
hatesfate 6
Well paint me blue and call me Sally...
cooterpie 11
Just be happy you've never had it, to know its real. Although I'd much rather paint you green and call you bob. That work for you?
krewer21 1
Awww don't be blue Sally.
perdix 31
It's actually Rocking Pneumonia. It's a symptom of the Boogie Woogie Flu.
MindFreakazoid 10
10 - Okay, Sally.
CharresBarkrey 16
7 - Since no one actually told you what it is, it's a less severe form of pneumonia that let's you still do your normal activity.
LolPieRofl 11
Well eff me in the butt and call me Sally :D
DictatorDom 5
I had it last year. It's pneumonia but you don't have to be hospitalized. But it still sucks, I was out of school for a month
sweetmama88 6
I hope you feel better soon
_streets_ 19
How about Depend's?
GothicAngel17 24
I feel your pain OP, my waters broke early due to a UTI. Add chronic hayfever to the mix. I peed myself and amniotic fluid would also go everywhere every time I sneezed.
cooterpie 11
Oh this sounds delightful. I can't wait to pop out some kids now!
GothicAngel17 24
Well, mine was 3 months early. I'm sure it doesn't always happen like that.
SkoomaKi 28
There must be an upside to this... You don't have to get up to reach the bathroom! You're like an adult baby.