Today, my girlfriend did the walk of shame in a skimpy Halloween costume after a night of drunken sex. Problem? The walk ended at my doorstep, and the sex was with a stranger. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I'm at odds with my fiancée because a drunk girl approached me at a Halloween party and complimented my costume. I barely acknowledged the woman and made polite small talk until she walked away. Apparently, I was too friendly and should have shooed the woman away rudely and immediately. FML
Today, my girlfriend informed me that during the night, I shot up in bed and whimpered tearfully, "I don't have anything for the fancy-dress!" She also decided to share this with all our friends. I'm never going to live this down. FML
Today, some filthy creep grabbed my girlfriend's ass in front of me. I smashed his face in, as would be expected. Afterwards, we had wild sex, then she cried, told me how frightened my "unprovoked violent response" made her, and kicked me out. I'm now in a seedy motel, wondering what the hell happened. FML
Today, we had a great night out with my girlfriend and even won a costume contest together. I guess I wasn't the only one who had a great night, because when I got home I found that someone had robbed my apartment. FML
Today, I woke up after a night out partying only to find I'd wet the bed. I was so ashamed that I rolled my girlfriend into it to avoid taking the blame. FML
Today, I brought a girl home from the bar. After sleeping together, she drunkenly stumbles to the bathroom to wash up. On her way back, she accidentally walks into my parents' room, turns on the lights and asks where her clothes are before figuring it out. FML
Today, I went to a haunted house with the girl I like, thinking that she would get scared and turn to me for comfort. I ended up running out, and was put on the Wall of Shame. FML
Today, I tried to have a fun night out. I met a guy and we went back to "his" place, which turned out to actually be his mother's house. He introduced me to her. Two hours later, I knew his life story and had to do the walk of shame without ever getting anywhere near his bedroom. FML
Today, after spending a great evening with the guy I really like, he dropped me off outside my house. When he pulled into my driveway, his lights shone onto my drunken mum taking the garbage out in nothing but her black panties. FML
Today, I was busily having fun with my girlfriend, when suddenly the bedroom door opened and a man walked in, picked me up, and threw me outside the apartment. I was naked and didn't even know she was into men, much less had a husband. FML
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Top comments
Nightwing98 22
What was her costume? Trampire?
welsea28 6
She probably felt guilty...either way sorry OP
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Comments (217)
donut_gurl 8
SOOO many girls have turned halloween into an occasion to dress and act sleezy. Dump her.
CallMeMcFeelii 14
That's why I love Halloween! Haha I'm only kidding.
SkoomaKi 28
I guess she'll just have to do the walk of shame all the way to her house too.
donut_gurl 8
maybe OP had to work late on Halloween.. or maybe he had to wake up super early and went home early. Sometimes stuff happens.. but either way, she is the one in the wrong.
supportcommand 17
Unless she lives with you, tell her to keep walking.
x_Gainer_x 6
And if she does live with you just pack your shit and leave!!! She'll have to live in a place that will remind her if her stupidity till she moves. And, you get to start some where fresh !!!
Czech_Zidane 14
You are right. But if she lives with OP in OP's flat, I would, if I were OP, just pack HER shit and leave her bags outside the door. It is MY apartment and no ***** allowed there. Period.
zack11742 7
I would die inside man that's horrible
thatonename 7
Probably the best way I've ever heard to describe that feeling. Sorry Op. That sucks so bad it beyond sucks.....
gnas_fml 4
pics or gtfo
SqueakyChipmunk 22
Says the guy with no picture.
gregkingsley 4
Depends if she was a hooker for Halloween. She was just really embracing her character.
White_like_dat 3
That trick WAS the treat
mikeymayhem_87 15
I guess some people really like to act like how they dress for Halloween. Sorry OP!
x_Gainer_x 6
You should have started that with "my now ex-girlfriend" ....