Anonymous
United States
Today, my girlfriend and I both developed food poisoning from last night's sushi. Our apartment has one bathroom. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
fuuuuuh
Santa Cruz, United States
Today, my family of five and I decided to have homemade sushi. We did not prepare the fish correctly, and now we all have excruciating food poisoning. The worst part? We only have one bathroom. FML
AW
Today, my husband and I are both suffering from food poisoning. He has horrible, raging, rank smelling, explosive diarrhea; I am vomiting every 15 minutes. We have one bathroom. FML
shattysituation
United States
Gross out competition
Today, my girlfriend and I decided to try a new place to eat. On our way home we both had upset stomachs. As we raced into the house we realized neither of us could hold it any longer. Having only one bathroom, I let her go first. She exploded on the toilet and I exploded in my pants. FML
shroooms
Slovenia
Today, my entire family, myself included, has been turned into a collective diarrhea fountain after going out to eat. We only have one bathroom. FML
Anonymous
Today, I and several housemates have food poisoning. From what? Last night's Subway, which we only got to avoid eating the pork that was possibly bad as none of us wanted to be sick. FML
I stink
Today, my boyfriend and I were finally able to settle on having a day out together after putting it off for months because of work/other random reasons. This morning I woke up with the worst case of diarrhea I’ve ever had in my life. I won’t be leaving the bathroom anytime soon. FML
takeshi
Today, I took my girlfriend to a restaurant we both like. By the end of the date, we were fighting and she angrily broke up with me. To make things worse, I got food poisoning. She didn't. FML
notyourcleaner
Puchong, Malaysia
Living the dream
Today, my new roommate puked into the sink and all over the bathroom floor, before passing out on her bed. Apparently, she was awake enough to wash her own face but not clean up her vomit. We share the bathroom. This is the second time already. FML
Anonymous
Two rooms, two atmospheres
Today, I tried to cook a nice meal for my sister's friends. It turned out perfect and they enjoyed it, while I was in the bathroom throwing up for two hours due to food poisoning. FML
mikesok988
United States
Cringe
Today, there was a potluck at my girlfriend's house. I had a sour stomach, so I went to the bathroom to relieve myself. When I flushed, nothing happened. They had to call a plumber to fix the toilet filled with my crap. The whole family watched, noses plugged and faces cringed, looking at me. FML
Top comments
EnterSandman_fml 20
Come on, almost every guy is a genital man.
SystemofaBlink41 27
Don't forget to flush...
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Comments (115)
shorty6823 28
Not all sushi is that bad
86ed 4
That's why man invented the tub.
LunaTics_fml 3
That's why? Damn I've been doing it wrong.
kyz_xox 11
My mom doesn't like it when I have sushi with fish. Not that often, that is. I normally eat avocado rolls.
minidinosaurgoes 9
One of you gets the toilet, the other the bathtub/shower or sink.
CaptTeemo 10
Time for some tag team puking. Don't be too eager to get in the toilet ring though, gotta make sure your partner had their fun.
iloveshim 14
Guess your ******** in the tub.
actingpickle09 3
Oh God, I'm so sorry! I hope you guys feel better soon and try to utilize sinks, garbage cans, buckets, shower, and whatever else you may have.
karlcolt45 19
double decker that shiz
APersonalProblem 13
Ladies first
zombieslayer83 19
I may be wrong, but I always thought food poisoning hit within a few hours?
kwyk 23
I also may be wrong, but I think there is viral and bacterial food-poisoning (probably others also, but I think less commonly), and presumably multiple types of each so it'll take varying amounts of time to set in. I seem to remember that viral takes ~3 hours and bacterial 10-15 hours to set in(...?) but I'm probably wrong on that. For more information, see google. Terms and conditions apply.
zombieslayer83 19
Thanks for explaining.