Work: Today, my financial situation is so dire that I tried to steal...

PoorGal 19 October 2015, 18:04 New Orleans, United States

Today, my financial situation is so dire that I tried to steal toilet paper from work. I got caught. FML

127 comments

Collection

Fall

Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.

Same thing different taste

pray for me 15 August 2019, 04:00

Today, I'm so broke after my recent divorce that I stole toilet paper from my church. I'm the pastor. FML

15 comments

busted 2 August 2012, 06:53 Edmonton, Canada

Today, I got caught shoplifting a toothbrush. I'm flat broke and my roommate used my old one to scrub out her cat's puke stains off the carpet. FML

93 comments

BrokeAndHungry 24 July 2016, 17:05 Ann Arbor, United States

Today, I was so ashamed of being broke that instead of asking my parents for money, I snuck into their house while they were at work to steal some of their food. FML

35 comments

Karma 15 March 2017, 02:00

Karma karma karma karma chameleon, you come and go.

Today, I forgot my phone in a restaurant bathroom because I was too distracted trying to steal three rolls of toilet paper without anyone noticing. After sinking that low because I was too broke to buy my own toilet roll, I'm now also in the market for a new phone. FML

22 comments

moneymoneymoney 8 October 2013, 14:34 Tampa, United States

Today, my financial troubles got so bad, I contemplated visiting a friend simply so I could swipe their deodorant. FML

85 comments

Shamed 6 September 2011, 08:06 United Kingdom

Sneaky

Today, I was on the toilet at work. After a very loud and very smelly session, I waited until the other stall had been vacated to keep my anonymity. As I leant forward for some toilet roll, my ID fell out of my pocket and into the next stall. When I came out, it was face up near the sink. FML

78 comments

ewww 30 July 2011, 14:07 United States

Today, while using the restroom at McDonald's, a hand reached under my stall and took the remaining toilet paper. FML

251 comments

SilverAuthor 29 July 2016, 22:53 Detroit, United States

Today, I slipped money into my mother's purse after she refused to let me pay for lunch. She caught me in the act and thought I was stealing money from her instead. FML

22 comments

Timmy 26 January 2009, 13:28 France

Today, I got caught stealing lollies. I am 25. FML

66 comments

Anonymous 31 October 2023, 06:00 Brisbane, Australia

Shit for brains

Today, in desperate need of a shit, I quickly ran into a shop to buy toilet paper. I rushed home and unleashed, only to realise I'd bought paper towels. Without options, I had to wipe my ass with them and consequently blocked the toilet. I found rolls of toilet paper while looking for the plunger. FML

2 comments

cutycat136 28

20 October 2015, 00:08

Think what do I need. Not coffee every morning, Internet could go, do you really need television if you have financial problems? If you've got cell data, is it absolutely necessary to have? What about getting rid of those old clothes you never wear anymore and could have a yard sale for? Take out all the unnecessary items and you'll find you're richer than you think.