Today, my crush and I were talking on the phone and we were really hitting it off. We got on the subject of sex and I told him I have a purity ring. Then he suddenly said he had to go and hang up. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Damn you, Siri
Today, when I was done masturbating to the thought of my crush I noticed my phone was lit up. I turned it over and stared in horror as I saw a call connected to him. I had been loudly moaning his name. I guess I hit his speed dial when I was setting my phone down. He was definitely still on the line. FML
Today, the phone rang so I went to answer it. No one was there. A minute later the phone rang again and no one answered so I assumed it was a telemarketer or a prank so I started swearing uncontrollably in rage. Turns out it was my crush calling to ask me out, but she was too nervous to ask. FML
Phoney sex
Today, after having some great, intimate phone sex with my boyfriend, he immediately said, "Well, gotta go," and hung up. Thanks for making me feel like some sort of phone-hooker, dude. FML
Today, I got my crush's phone number. I started texting him and once I told him who it was, he stopped replying. FML
Saucy talk
Today, I was talking dirty with my husband over the phone while he was out of town. I started to verbally act out his fantasy and got quite into it. I was returned with silence. Embarrassed, I tried to hang up. Turns out the call had already been dropped, five minutes prior. FML
One simple trick
Today, I was on the phone to a guy I really like from work. We'd been talking for about 2 minutes, when he said he was getting another call, and put me on hold. I was so excited to be on the phone with him, it took me a whole 15 minutes to realise he had actually just hung up on me. FML
Today, my crush took me out to lunch. When the waiter came for our orders he ordered onoin rings and looks at me and says, "I won't be kissing anyone tonight anyways." FML
Today, I was having phone sex with my boyfriend. Trying to be sexy, I told him what I was doing with my vibrator. I heard a loud bang, followed by him shouting, "Why don't you just fucking marry it, then?!" and then hanging up. FML
Privacy
Today, I was talking on the phone to my crush so I went into the bathroom for some privacy. My drunk mother started banging on the door, asking what I was doing in there. I told her that I was on the phone, so she yelled super loud, "While you're shitting?" He immediately hung up. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were talking on the phone, and things got a little heated. We were in the middle of some kinky dialog, complete with hand action when he suddenly goes silent. While waiting for a response, I heard typing on the other end. He was checking his email. FML
Top comments
theSil 0
it won't be the last guy to do that
skyeyez9 25
I find purity rings a bit creepy, considering most purity rings are given to girls by their fathers. You can still hold your values and not have a "purity ring."
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Comments (157)
Shadow9876 19
Purity ring?
becca9985 34
You know what? You don't need someone like that in your life. You need someone who respects your values because that is who you are. If they won't respect your values, they won't respect you.
becca9985 34
@103 & @118: Seriously?! The ring is a symbol, much like a wedding band. It's not a reminder to be pure, it's not a piece of cheap plastic/metal; it's a symbol of something valuable to the wearer, clearly something neither of you knows anything about. I didn't read much higher than those, because all the YDI's to her for sticking to her values disgust me.
I'madumbass 19
NEVER MENTION A PURITY RING!!!!!! ESPECIALLY NOT TO YOUR CRUSH!!!!! WHO SEEMED TO LIKE YOU BY THE WAY!!!!!!!!!
InsanityShard 23
Accidental ydi. Sorry. =[