Today, my crush and I were talking on the phone and we were really hitting it off. We got on the subject of sex and I told him I have a purity ring. Then he suddenly said he had to go and hang up. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, when I was done masturbating to the thought of my crush I noticed my phone was lit up. I turned it over and stared in horror as I saw a call connected to him. I had been loudly moaning his name. I guess I hit his speed dial when I was setting my phone down. He was definitely still on the line. FML
Today, the phone rang so I went to answer it. No one was there. A minute later the phone rang again and no one answered so I assumed it was a telemarketer or a prank so I started swearing uncontrollably in rage. Turns out it was my crush calling to ask me out, but she was too nervous to ask. FML
Today, after having some great, intimate phone sex with my boyfriend, he immediately said, "Well, gotta go," and hung up. Thanks for making me feel like some sort of phone-hooker, dude. FML
Today, I got my crush's phone number. I started texting him and once I told him who it was, he stopped replying. FML
Today, I was talking dirty with my husband over the phone while he was out of town. I started to verbally act out his fantasy and got quite into it. I was returned with silence. Embarrassed, I tried to hang up. Turns out the call had already been dropped, five minutes prior. FML
Today, I was on the phone to a guy I really like from work. We'd been talking for about 2 minutes, when he said he was getting another call, and put me on hold. I was so excited to be on the phone with him, it took me a whole 15 minutes to realise he had actually just hung up on me. FML
Today, my crush took me out to lunch. When the waiter came for our orders he ordered onoin rings and looks at me and says, "I won't be kissing anyone tonight anyways." FML
Today, I was having phone sex with my boyfriend. Trying to be sexy, I told him what I was doing with my vibrator. I heard a loud bang, followed by him shouting, "Why don't you just fucking marry it, then?!" and then hanging up. FML
Today, I was talking on the phone to my crush so I went into the bathroom for some privacy. My drunk mother started banging on the door, asking what I was doing in there. I told her that I was on the phone, so she yelled super loud, "While you're shitting?" He immediately hung up. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were talking on the phone, and things got a little heated. We were in the middle of some kinky dialog, complete with hand action when he suddenly goes silent. While waiting for a response, I heard typing on the other end. He was checking his email. FML
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Top comments
theSil 0
it won't be the last guy to do that
skyeyez9 25
I find purity rings a bit creepy, considering most purity rings are given to girls by their fathers. You can still hold your values and not have a "purity ring."
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Comments (157)
Sargasm 4
Purity rings are great. I'm actually coming up with a line jewelry to remind the weak minded of what they should and shouldn't be doing. Here's what I have so far: - "Shower Every Day" necklace - "Don't Forget To Keep Breathing" anklet - "Look Both Ways Before Crossing" wrist watch - "Lick It Before You Stick It" clitoral piercing
HeaRTs_Girl 0
I'm saying YDI. Every last person I've known who had a purity ring was always an insane, overzealous religious fanatic. So **** you. He probably freaked out because you came on too strongly and scared him, not because he wanted to get laid. I hate religious crazies so damn much... >_< ...
anorexicbarbie 8
Don't be such a narrow minded asshole, you don't have to be religious to wear a purity ring.
HeaRTs_Girl 0
Meant to say HATE, my bad.
iSurf_fml 8
Why do young relationships have to be so serious? It's just stupid to try and constantly think about and find "the one". For god's sake. Can no one try to live their lives first?
bakerella 29
Because HORMONES, thought that was obvious There will be tons of guys like that. Eventually you're going to find a good man worth your time. And I say MAN, not boy. It's probably going to be a while
Oniat 2
YDI. You can have your values without being "reminded" (if you need a reminder of what you believe in, you may want to reconsider your morals) by a silly "purity" ring (sex is natural, nothing to be labeled as immoral or disgusting). Stay true to yourself, not a piece of plastic
Jasonf6 0
haha, purity ring. religious people make me laugh.
Riddles66 0
He's not worth your time homie
mishyyyb 5
most of the comments on here make me realize how stupid people are... pro abstinence can make you anti sex?! seriously?! my sister waited until she was married and she has sex just fine, my friend's parents waited and now they have sex all the time... for thinking that... you are stupid
jmorin 0
ever think that maybe risking getting a STD is something she doesn't want? or chancing an unplanned pregnancy that could alter her chances for an education and being successful? its the rest of you who need to grow up. I support her. forget that sad excuse for a man and find a real one. stay strong.
lulzworthy 3
You deserved it you prude.